Emotional resilience is the skill to adjust to change and move on, from negative or traumatic experiences, in a positive way. To keep a healthy balance between a tough head and a warm heart. As you build your emotional intelligence competencies and skills you are also building your emotional resilience, though a person with a high level of emotional intelligence still gets frustrated, angered, stressed, or anxious. The main difference is that a person with emotional resilience knows how to prevent and bounce back from those situations. Emotional resilience does not mean pushing your emotions down or away, or ignoring them altogether. It means acknowledging and managing them well. Your heart needs to stay open for you, so you can care for yourself in even the worst times. Before you delve into the five pillars of emotional resilience, I would like to share with you the best advice to be resilient:

• Being resilient is not blocking out your feelings with drugs, pretending that everything is OK when it is not, or being too tough to tell someone you are proud of them, love them, or appreciate them, not crying when someone you love dies, ignoring everyone else and always putting yourself first, being aggressive, verbally violent, or looking for a fight.
• Being resilient is staying calm and clear headed when pressure and stress around you are high, so you can bounce back quickly from upsets, set-backs and bad moods or emotions. In other words, you don't get stuck in bitterness, anger, or resentment as you have the mental toughness to guard against being sucked in. Keep a sense of humor: losing your sense of humor and no longer laughing at issues you would normally laugh at, are one of the early warning signs of too much stress. Keep things in perspective, rather than letting emotions such as anger, exasperation, or anxiety distort your worldview, so you can judge situations fairly. Do not take personally comments or actions, that are not meant for you, don't waste time and energy with gossips, retaliating, sulking, or being upset. Don't take on board other people's problems, stupidity, or emotions, but stay compassionate and caring for others. This requires mental toughness and a warm heart. Look after yourself psychologically, spiritually, and emotionally, too often when people are no longer resilient and they become overwhelmed, tense, or stressed, and stop looking after themselves and indulge in self-defeating behavior. Feel and express your emotions in ways that are safe, clear, and healthy. Emotional denial or suppression of what you feel may be needed at specific times in order to survive but not on a daily basis. If emotional denial and emotional suppression are your daily basis, normal depression and burnout will be the sure outcomes and no one wants that. So, let's learn how to build the strong pillars of our emotional household.