Index
Acknowledge stage in decision cycle, 22–27
commitment to change in, 88–89
number of people in, 37
Acknowledge step in objections to change, 135–136
and confirming step, 141–145
behaviors avoided in, 51–52
Aging parents, 11–12
Aim of questions, 52–54, 56, 86
Analytical personality type, adjustments needed for, 156–157
“And?,” as developing probe, 67
Apology avoided in confirming objections to change, 143–144
Asking questions. See Questions asked
Belief, 6–15
importance of, 7
in sales product, 8–10
Buyer’s remorse or reconsider stage, 34–36, 103
Buying cycle, 18
Cars
decision point in purchase of, 25–26
rental of, 76–78
Change
belief in, 6–15
commitment to, 85–108
confirming benefits of, 98–99
consequences as motivation for, 80–82
decision cycle in, 17–37
in acknowledge stage, 24–25, 26
objections to change in, 128–129
implementation of process, 149–164
initial conversation on, 109–125
objections to, 127–147
reassurance on, 104–106
Cigarette smoking
consequences of, 80–81
Clarification of objections to change, 132–135, 143
Clarification of problem
developing probes in, 65–69, 75, 79, 86
identifying probes in, 60–65, 75, 79
impact probes in, 70–71, 75, 79, 86
Closed questions, 45–46
Commitment to change, 85–108
confirming benefits of, 98–99
discussing logistics of, 102–103
earning the right to ask for, 85, 93–95
methods of asking for, 100–102
myths concerning, 91–97
necessity of asking for, 95–96
reassurance on, 104–106
summary commitment in, 97–108
transition to, 107–108
Communication
facial expressions in, 107
in initial conversation on change, 109–125
listening in. See Listening
questions asked in. See Questions asked
tone of, 107
Xerox survey on preferences in, 42
“you said” response in, 90–91
Confirming benefits of change, 98–99
Confirming objections to change, 141–145
avoiding apology in, 143–144
Confrontational approach avoided in objections to change, 132–133
Consequences of actions, 2–3
as motivation, 80–82
Cost, objections to change based on, 145–147
Criteria stage in decision cycle, 28–31
acknowledge stage in, 22–27, 88–89
affecting implementation of change process, 151, 152
commitment to change in, 88–89
creating urgency in, 56, 57–83
criteria stage in, 28–31
initial conversation on change in, 120
investigate stage in, 31–32, 37
reconsider stage in, 34–36, 103
select stage in, 33–34
Decision-making, strategic, in implementation of change process, 150–158
Developing probes, 65–69, 75, 79, 86
“And?” as, 67
Disney, Walt, 15
Doctors, influence of, 12–14
Dominant personality type, adjustments needed for, 156
Domonkos, Larry, 69
Drawback objection, 138–140
Einstein, Albert, 44
in objections to change, 137
Enterprise rental cars, 76–78
Facial expressions, 107
in acknowledge stage, 24–25, 26
objections to change in, 128–129
“Feel, felt, found” technique in objections to change, 137–138
Financial hobby case, 59
developing probes in, 66
identifying probes in, 60–61, 63
impact probes in, 79
“what if” questions in, 63
Fix, don’t fix line, 27
Franklin, Ben, 75
Greed, 112
and desire for success, 112–113
Home purchase, decision cycle in, 21–24, 28–29, 30–36
Homework hassle case, 97
asking for commitment in, 101
confirming benefits in, 99
discussing logistics in, 103
reassurance in, 106
Hook step in initiation of change, 111–114, 119
“what’s in it for me” question and answer in, 112
Hostage negotiation, 104–105
Identifying probes, 60–65, 75, 79
“what if” questions as, 63–64
Impact probes, 70–71, 75, 79, 86
words used in, 70
Implementation of change process, 149–164
adjustments to opening conversation in, 155
anticipation of objections in, 154–155
anticipation of strengths and weaknesses in, 153–154
decision cycle stage affecting, 151, 152
flexibility in tactics used, 152–153
personality types affecting, 155–160
strategic decision-making in, 150–158
worksheet on, 169–170
Influence
flexibility in implementation of process, 149–164
identifying, developing, and impact probes in, 60–71
initial conversation in, 109–125
intent of, 87
manipulation compared to. See Manipulation and influence compared
objections to, 127–147
pitch compared to, 5
trust required for, 39–56
Initial conversation on change, 109–125
anticipation of adjustments needed in, 155
asking for help in, 121–122
buzzwords avoided in, 124–125
opening in, 109–111, 118–119, 121–123
time duration of, 116–118, 120
on value, 122–123
word choices in, 121–125
written preparation for, 118, 155
Insurance sales
belief in, 8–10
decision cycle in, 29
waiting for phone calls in, 29, 63
Intent of influence, 87
Introduction in opening conversation, 110–111, 119
Investigate stage in decision cycle, 31–32
number of people in, 37
Lifestyle
of aging parents, 11–12
healthy changes in, 2–3, 12–14
Line in sand or decision point, 24, 25–27
behaviors avoided in, 51–52
“you said” response in, 90–91
Logistics in commitment to change, discussions on, 102–103
Management mess case, objections to change in, 131
acknowledgment of, 135–136
clarification of, 134
confirmation of, 141
drawback, 139–140
“feel, felt, found” technique in, 137–138
Manipulation and influence compared, 6, 8, 171–174
commitment to change in, 86, 173
decision process in, 17
impact probes on problems in, 70, 172
implementation of change in, 149, 154
initiation of change in, 109, 123–124, 173
intent in, 87
objections to change in, 127, 140, 173
victory and success in, 163, 174
Mays, Billy, 5
Michener, James, 162
Misunderstandings in objections to change, 136
Motivation for change
consequences of actions in, 80–82
value in, 82
Needs
lack of, objection to change in, 129–130
“No hurry” objection to change, 130–131
“No need” objection to change, 129–130
Objections to change, 127–147
acknowledgment of, 135–136
anticipation of, 154–155
clarification of, 132–135, 143
confirmation of, 141–145
cost as factor in, 145–147
drawback in, 138–140
in fear of change, 128–129
“feel, felt, found” technique in, 137–138
misunderstandings in, 136
in no hurry, 130–131
in no need, 129–130
response to, 136
Opening conversation for initiation of change, 106–111, 118–119
anticipation of adjustments needed in, 155
asking for help in, 121
value in, 122–123
written preparation for, 118, 155
Open questions, 45, 46, 49–50, 56
active listening to responses, 50–52
best example of, 49–50
declaration on use of, 46
as identifying probes, 61–62
“Pain” questions, 71–72
Parents, aging, 11–12
Personality types, 155–160
Pitch, 4–6
compared to influence, 5
definition of, 4
Problems
alternative words for, 62
avoiding questions on, 54–55, 56
belief in solutions, 6–15
decision cycle in, 17–37
developing probes on, 65–69, 75, 79, 86
identifying probes on, 60–65, 75, 79
impact probes on, 70–71, 75, 79, 86
listening to, 59
“what if” questions on, 63–64, 77–78
Procrastination, 59
in acknowledge stage, 24
identifying probes in, 62
in influence and manipulation compared, 62, 172
Questions asked
active listening to responses in, 50–52, 56
“and?,” 67
avoiding problems in, 54–55, 56
closed questions in, 45–46
on commitment to change, 85, 87–89, 93–96, 100–102
developing probes in, 65–69, 75, 79, 86
empathy in, 72
establishing trust in, 41–56
identifying probes in, 60–65, 75, 79
impact probes in, 70–71, 75, 79, 86
open questions in. See Open questions
“pain” questions in, 71–72
sense of urgency created in, 58
by therapist, 73–75
“what’s in it for me?,” 112
Real estate, decision cycle in purchase of, 21–24, 28–29, 30–36
Reassurance on commitment to change, 104–106
Reconsider stage in decision cycle, 34–36, 103
Relationship rut case, initial conversation on change in, 110
hook step in, 113–114
time duration of, 116–117
Resistance to change, 127–147. See also Objections to change
Riley, James Whitcomb, 1
Roosevelt, Franklin Delano, 51
Sales process
belief in product affecting, 8–10
commitment to change in, 93–95
decision cycle in, 29
pitch in, 4–6
as repeatable and predictable, 18
trust in, 48
waiting for phone calls in, 29, 63
Sanders, Henry “Red,” 162
Satisfied stage in decision cycle, 20–22
number of people in, 20–21, 37
Select stage in decision cycle, 33–34
Smith, Dean, 163
Smoking
consequences of, 80–81
Social personality type, adjustments needed for, 157
Sports in America (Michener), 162
Strategic decision-making in implementation of change process, 150–158
Success
and effort, 161–163
and greed, 112–113
and winning, 161–163
Summary commitment, 97–108
asking for commitment in, 100–102
confirming benefits in, 98–99
discussing logistics in, 102–103
reassurance in, 104–106
TCO (total cost of ownership), 145–147
Therapists, questions asked by, 73–75
Time duration of initial conversation on change, 116–118, 120
Tone of conversations, 107
Toothbrush example on total cost of ownership, 145–146
Total cost of ownership (TCO), 145–147
Toyota, 53–54
Trust, 39–56
asking questions and listening in creation of, 41–56
as critical step, 153
Urgency
lack of
in acknowledge stage, 24
objection to change in, 130–131
in providing solutions, 65
Valenti, John, 12–13
Value
initial conversation on change on, 122–123
as motivation, 82
“What if” questions, 63–64, 77–78
“What’s in it for me” question and answer in hook step, 112
Whining (acknowledge) stage in decision cycle, 22–27
WIFM (what’s in it for me), 112
Wilde, Oscar, 143
Winning, and success, 161–163
Word choices
apology avoided in, 143–144
in closed questions, 45
in developing probes, 67
in impact probes, 70
in initial conversation on change, 121–125
as substitute for word “problem,” 62
in “what if” questions, 63–64, 77–78
in “you said” response, 90–91
Written preparation for initial conversation on change, 118, 155
Xerox
earning right to ask for commitment to change in, 93–95
persuasion method of, 3
study on asking for commitment, 92
survey on communication preferences, 42
training on sales process in, 18, 89–90
“You said” response, 90–91