What is a fulfilled life? Where does success fit in? Is success part of fulfilment or a distortion of it? When you seek fulfilment are you looking for false horizons and not living enough in the present? How can you enjoy the present to the full as well as being on a journey on which you are seeking to make a difference? Where does hope fit in: is it just a denial of the importance of living in the present? What aspects of fulfilment are most important to you? These are some of the questions that inevitably strike people from time to time. Often you may dismiss them as you focus on day-to-day business, but if they go unanswered you can be left with a heavy heart, regretting that you did not take the time to think them through.
Understanding what fulfilment means for you gives you a framework for deciding the most important way of spending your time and energy. A key consideration is the balance between the short-term and the long-term. You can be very fulfilled by the tasks of a particular day, be it the lecture you are giving, the patients you are seeing or the projects you are overseeing. But having a clear understanding of what might be your fulfilment in the longer term can help you shape the short-term and provide you with a sense of perspective and purpose.
When asked in an interview if she had any 'personal drivers', one candidate replied that she did not have the luxury of a chauffeur! But maybe some of your personal drivers are like chauffeurs who take you to destinations where you may, or may not, want to go. The drivers for success or recognition can be strong positives when giving you a focus for your energies, but they can also be negative if they distort your behaviour and destroy your perspective.
George felt a strong drive to become a college principal and he focused his time and energy around that. He was at the cutting edge of curriculum development and built networks both locally and nationally. He was willing to support his colleagues because he thought that was the right thing to do, and because it had the side benefit of enhancing his reputation. At one stage George was working excessive hours on a long-term basis, giving himself virtually no respite at the weekends. He began to ask himself why he was driven so much. Health problems gave him a shock and made him stand back.
George did not modify his ambition of wanting to become a college principal, but he was able to set his ambition into a wider context. He took up regular physical exercise, renewed friendships outside the professional educational world and stopped doing some of the less important networking. The result was that his ambition became better focused; he was a more cheerful and healthier individual with a wider range of interests. He did become a college principal, but was immensely grateful for the 'wake-up call' that allowed him to re-evaluate his priorities and put his sense of drive into a wider context.
I like the comparison in Box 15 between the calming words of Psalm 23 and the hectic words of 'Not Psalm 23', which may bring you up short as you reflect on how driven you sometimes are!
When you have family responsibilities, a prime purpose of work is raising funds to live on and provide for your family. A happy, well-fed and cared-for family is a perfectly legitimate kind of fulfilment. But can fulfilment be more than that? Fulfilment can be a job well done; delivering outcomes you had not thought possible; influencing the direction of the team of which you are part; and enabling others to do their job well. It might be worth reflecting on:
Where do you believe you have made the biggest difference over the last year?
Over the next year where do you think you could have the biggest impact?
In what areas of your life will making a difference give you the greatest satisfaction (e.g. in your work, with your family, within your community or through your personal interests)?
For some people 'What is your life purpose?' is a helpful question, for others it is a turn-off. For some, the notion that they have a life purpose determined other than by their own action is superstition, for others they believe that there can be a life calling that it is right to seek after.
Jayne felt that she had a life purpose to be a doctor, which gave her a very specific aspiration. Her grandfather had been a doctor and was a good role model. Other influences on her were her school, her parents, her enjoyment of biology and a fascination with medical ethical issues. This collection of factors reinforced the belief that her life purpose was to be a doctor. She followed her dream, which helped motivate her when the studying became more difficult.
Isa had felt a strong sense of life purpose to become a barrister and was utterly single-minded in approaching this goal, but she found it very difficult to get a pupilage in chambers and, when she did, she struggled to get enough clients. Eventually she accepted that she had to change direction, as the courtroom was not the place where she excelled. Isa reframed her expectations and became a very fulfilled solicitor. She recognised that while her sense of life purpose had helped get her through a law degree, she had to adopt a revised sense of it to take account of practical reality.
For some people this is a central question, for others it is irrelevant. Faith is not about leaving your judgement behind, it involves working through issues about what life is all about. For many people faith in a loving God provides the context and meaning for their approach to life and work. When individuals dismiss faith as irrelevant, then they can be missing a whole dimension of fulfilment.
Questions to ask yourself might be:
Does the faith dimension have a place in the way I seek to contribute and see my own fulfilment?
Do I understand how the faith dimension influences the approaches of those I am working with?
Is there more I would like to do to develop my understanding of the faith dimension as it affects me personally or those I am working with?
