Ask for Help

Markita Andrews has generated more than $80,000 selling Girl Scout cookies since she was seven years old. She does not propose to be smarter or more extroverted than other people. Rather, she claims the difference is that she has discovered the secret of selling: Ask, Ask, Ask! The fear of rejection causes many people to fail before they begin because they don’t just ask for what they want.

Since the task of introducing a new idea into an organization is a big job, look for people and resources to help your efforts.

You are an Evangelist(144) or Dedicated Champion(129) working to introduce a new idea into your organization.

The job of introducing a new idea into an organization is too big for one person, especially a newcomer who doesn’t know the ropes.

The single biggest failing of many change agents is that they do not look for help. They believe they can do it themselves, or they feel they can’t ask for help because this would reveal their own inadequacies. Yet the likelihood of success is directly related to their ability to ask others for help.

David Baum, author of Lightning in a Bottle, has observed that a leader who appears invulnerable, never showing anything but complete confidence and certainty, will eventually create a workforce with a somewhat warped view of reality. On the other hand, a leader who admits his vulnerability will find that people will move to support him in surprising and generous ways.

We all need help at times. People who set a high goal will eventually find that they cannot achieve it without other people. It can take effort to find help but the return can be worth it. Taking the steps to identify what resources are available will allow you to take advantage of them.

Often we feel it would be easier to just do it ourselves, but involving others will bring extra benefits in addition to the help. Involvement leads to growing support for your new idea. It can also encourage people to take partial or complete ownership of the project—this is especially valuable for a change agent who hopes to spark the idea and then pass it on to others to implement.

Some people are not quick to volunteer their help or advice. It could be because no one ever asked them. Most people are more likely to help when they are asked. Most people want to be connected, invited, and involved. Most people will have energy and commitment if they are given the opportunity to be players and to influence an initiative’s outcome.

Therefore:

Ask as many people as you can for help when you need it. Don’t try to do it alone.

Get the help, advice, and resources of people who care about you and/or the things you care about. Look around and talk to everyone about the innovation. You may think you don’t know anyone who can help you with your dream but keep talking and then talk some more. Ask them at The Right Time(207) and remember to Just Say Thanks(183).

Sometimes it takes digging—you might have to talk to someone who knows someone, and so on, before you get the help you need. Every organization provides some kind of support: Web development, graphic design, special printing, free advertising, corporate publications, secretaries, and assistants. Help can be there for the asking. Sometimes just wandering over to a support area and stopping at someone’s desk can help you discover what’s available.

If a person is hesitant to agree to your request for help, turn it around. Explain how this opportunity can be an advantage to him, such as allowing him to learn something new, make new contacts, or even add a line to his end-of-year report.

Don’t become discouraged if the help is slow in coming. Even a small start can help you promote your ideas, leading to more resources in the future.

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This pattern builds support from people who will now feel part of the effort. Small contributions from a variety of individuals can create Small Successes(216) and can add up to significant results. Most importantly, each time you ask for help, you’ll bring in more interested individuals.

The risk is that asking for help can be seen as a sign of incompetence, especially if you are part of an organization that fosters a “You should be able do it yourself” image. You can overcome this difficulty by creating a Group Identity(155) and involving everyone who has contributed to the initiative.

Someone told Samantha, “No one knows you. If you talk to Mark or Greg, they know how to get things done and I’m sure they’ll help you.” He was right, and it made a big difference. Mark told her how to reach the editor of the online daily newsletter to announce upcoming events. Greg introduced her to the tech support person who could set up a bulletin board for the new idea. They were both available when she had questions. She felt like she had a chance at it after that.

Writing computer programs in pairs is part of a new agile software development approach. Programmers say that pairing makes it easier to admit they don’t know something. In the pair programming relationship, individuals lose the embarrassment that typifies the lone cowboy coder who would rather try to muddle through on his own. Asking for help has become a natural part of the software development process.