Positive reframing is a fantastic tool. Positive reframing is where the mediator restates a party's statements or points of view in more neutral or positive language but without changing the meaning. Restating helps parties to appreciate that you have listened and understood them, but when restated in more neutral terms, it can encourage them to appreciate how others may view things. It also shifts the focus from the person to the behavior concerned.
Positive reframing may also help to identify the gap that exists between the two opposing viewpoints and identify the issue that needs to be resolved. This can help to focus on what needs to be done to find a solution.
Examples of statements and positive reframing are shown in the following table:
|
Statements |
Positive restatement |
|---|---|
|
He never listens to anything I say. |
It is important to you that he understands what you are saying. |
|
She is so stupid, I have told her a million times how to do it. |
It is necessary to find a way to provide the right support to embed the learning. |
|
He is always so rude and bossy. |
His manner and management style are of concern. |
|
She is oversensitive and cannot take any kind of criticism of her work. |
It is important to find a way of providing feedback that will be viewed as constructive. |
Think of some negative statements. This can be anything, a moan about the kids, your partner, work colleagues, or friends who have irritated you! Then restate these statements as positively as you can. You can have fun with this exercise by being as creative as you can.