Lucia dreaded interacting with her colleague Ray. Meetings that were scheduled for an hour would last two. Once Ray started talking, he wouldn’t stop. “He loved to be heard, so he would always go on and on and on to anybody who would listen,” she told me.
She and her colleagues exchanged knowing glances when Ray launched into one of his monologues. If people tried to interrupt him, he raised his voice to speak over them. The implicit message underlying these diatribes was that he knew what the team and company needed and everyone else should listen. “There’s no doubt he was a smart man,” Lucia says, “but he did little more than talk about everything he knew. He delegated almost all of his work to others.”
Most of us have dealt with a coworker like Ray at some point in our careers. The know-it-all who is convinced that they’re the smartest person in the room, hogs airtime in meetings, and has no qualms about interrupting others. They gleefully inform you of what’s right, even if they’re clearly wrong—or they’re lacking information or fail to understand the nuances of a situation.
Here are some of the hallmarks of the office know-it-all:
- Displaying a “my way or the highway” attitude
- Monopolizing conversations, refusing to be interrupted, and talking over others
- Positioning their own ideas as superior
- Refusing to listen to or heed criticism or feedback
- Speaking in a condescending tone
- Explaining things that others already understand
- Rarely asking questions or displaying curiosity
- Stealing or not sharing credit for group successes
- Jumping into conversations uninvited
Lucia felt trapped whenever she was talking with Ray and found herself lying to get out of meetings with him. She didn’t like resorting to these tactics, but she wasn’t sure how else to handle his condescending manner and the time lost to his pontificating on a daily basis.
Should Lucia point out Ray’s domineering style? Or should she find more subtle ways of dealing with him? How do you work with someone who has such a huge ego?
The first step toward a better working relationship with someone like Ray is to understand what makes them tick.
The Background on Know-It-All Behavior
When we talk about our know-it-all colleagues, we often use terms like “egomaniac” or “narcissist.” But we need to be careful with these labels. Narcissism is a psychiatric disorder characterized by attention-seeking, a strong sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy, and a tendency to self-promote. Your colleague may exhibit some of these traits (or maybe all of them), but a diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder is unlikely; pathological narcissism is rare, found in only 0.5 percent of the US population, for example.1 As with the other archetypes in this book, your efforts are best spent on responding productively to your colleague’s arrogance, not on diagnosing them.
The term know-it-all was first used in the English language in the late nineteenth century, although arrogance, I’m sure, has existed for much longer. Unfortunately, this archetype has likely persisted, not just in workplaces but in society (hello, American politics), because we often reward the associated behavior. If people who were humble and admitted that they didn’t always have the answers regularly rose to power, perhaps fewer of us would have stories about know-it-alls in our lives. But we love confidence—in ourselves and in others.
Overconfidence bias
Scientists who study decision-making consistently find that we tend to rate ourselves as better at things than we actually are.2 Students overestimate how well they will do on tests.3 Graduating MBA students overestimate the number of job offers they’ll receive and what their starting salaries will be.4 And the unemployed often overestimate how easy it will be to land a job.5 Research has also shown that overconfidence is contagious.6 If someone on your team, whether they’re a peer or a leader, has an inflated sense of their abilities, you are more likely to experience excessive self-assurance as well.
One of my favorite measures of just how overconfident we are is the way people rate themselves as drivers. One study found that 74 percent of licensed drivers think they are better than average—clearly, a statistical impossibility.7
Confidence is a good thing, as long as it’s backed up by competence, but unfortunately, that’s not always the case.
Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, a professor of business psychology, has been on a mission over the past decade to shine a light on the problem of overconfidence in organizations. In 2013, he wrote an article that became one of the most popular that Harvard Business Review has ever published called “Why Do So Many Incompetent Men Become Leaders?” In it, and in the book by the same name, he explains that when there are competencies that are difficult to measure objectively, like “leadership,” we rely on the way someone presents themselves to assess how well they perform.8 You can’t take a test on leadership and get an unbiased score. So, instead, we let people tell us how good they are, and we end up conflating confidence and competence, so much so that we tend to believe that confidence, in and of itself, is a trait that makes leaders great—when, in fact, lots of evidence shows that the best leaders, whether in business, sports, or politics, are humble.9
As the title of the hit article indicates, there is a gender component to this phenomenon: men are more likely to display confidence (or overconfidence) than women are.10 This is due to the ways people are socialized and rewarded: women, for instance, are often punished for touting their own capabilities and accomplishments.11 As Chamorro-Premuzic writes, “The truth of the matter is that pretty much anywhere in the world men tend to think that they are much smarter than women.”12 This leads to a particular type of know-it-all behavior: mansplaining.
Mansplaining
Most of us are now familiar with this phenomenon, which Merriam-Webster defines as “what occurs when a man talks condescendingly to someone (especially a woman) about something he has incomplete knowledge of, with the mistaken assumption that he knows more about it than the person he’s talking to does.” The term has gained popularity over the last decade. The New York Times included it in its list of words of the year for 2010, and it was added to the online Oxford Dictionaries in 2014. (See the sidebar “A Quick Note about Mansplaining.”)
Most people credit writer Rebecca Solnit with naming this phenomenon in her 2008 essay, “Men Explain Things to Me.”13 She didn’t use the term mansplaining then, but she described the occurrence, which struck a chord with women and people from other underestimated groups.
Research has since revealed that it’s more than just an anecdotal nuisance. Studies show that men, especially powerful men, speak more in meetings.14 When women are outnumbered by men in a group, they speak for between a quarter and a third less time than the men.15 Men also interrupt others more frequently and are less likely to yield when they are interrupted.16 A review of fifteen years of the transcripts of US Supreme Court oral arguments revealed that male justices interrupt the female justices approximately three times as often as they interrupt each other.17
Whether or not gender is playing a role in your interactions with your know-it-all colleague, there are several other factors that could be contributing to their haughtiness: organizational or regional culture, power, or insecurity.
The possible origins of your coworker’s swagger
Many company cultures reward people who act as if they have all the answers. Do employees who state their ideas with conviction tend to get more support for those ideas at your workplace? If people appear uncertain, are they considered weak? In many firms, decision-making is a competitive sport, rather than a collaborative effort, and acting like you know everything is a shrewd survival technique.
National or regional culture can also play a role. Harvard Business School professor Francesca Gino attributes her tendency to interrupt to her native culture. “Italians are often expressive and verbal, and we tend to take interruptions as a sign of interest in the conversation rather than a lack of interest in what someone is saying,” she’s written.18 While it’s important not to assume everyone from a certain culture behaves in the same way, research has proven Gino out—some cultures, such as Italy, Germany, and Israel, tend to view assertiveness as an expression of engagement.19 Perhaps your difficult colleague hails from one of these places, or maybe you find grandstanding particularly offensive because you’re from a culture that typically values modesty and humility?
Gino uncovered other motivators of brashness in her research as well—in particular, power. In one study, she and her coauthors induced some participants to feel powerful by asking them to write about a time when they had authority over others. These people were more likely than participants who hadn’t done the writing exercise to value their ideas over an informed adviser’s when making a decision. In another study, the group who had written about a moment of power beforehand dominated discussions and interrupted frequently.20
Many of the know-it-alls who I’ve worked with have been trying to cover up incompetence or insecurities—subconsciously or not. This can be especially pronounced when someone is new to the organization or to a role—think first-time managers.
I worked with a coaching client—a logistics director at a manufacturing firm—who was unknowingly trying to prove himself to his new colleagues. The head of HR had brought me in because of tension that plagued the leadership team in the few months since Boris had joined the company. She explained that Boris was alienating his peers by regularly starting sentences with, “At my last job …” This made people think he felt superior to them.
When I sat down with Boris and his colleagues, he repeated this refrain twice in the first fifteen minutes of the conversation. Fortunately, I was able to calmly call it out: “I don’t think you’re aware of this, but you’ve mentioned your previous employer two times already.” He had no idea. Later, he confessed to me that he was trying to prove his worth. “I thought they hired me because of what I’d done and learned in that previous role,” he explained. It was a hard habit to break, and he continued to slip on occasion, but his colleagues, knowing he wasn’t bragging intentionally, were much more forgiving.
Talking up your accomplishments is an understandable but misguided tactic often employed by people who, like Boris, are unsure of themselves and want to establish their value in a new role or team. Regardless of the motivation behind know-it-all behavior, however, there are clear costs.
The Costs of Working with a Know-It-All
I’ll admit that, of all the archetypes in this book, this is the one I relate to most. Not because I’ve worked with a lot of these people but because I’ve often acted like a know-it-all myself. I’m not proud of the times when I confidently proclaimed something that I didn’t actually know for sure or acted like I knew more than everyone in the room. I’m aware that when I state something with certainty—even when my projected assurance is out of proportion to how certain I actually feel—people are likely to listen.
But I’ve also seen the downsides of this approach—how my self-assurance has silenced a colleague’s curiosity, or how my condescending attitude has made a friend feel small.
Even worse, working with a know-it-all can hinder your career. Even if your colleague’s intention is to help you understand something, it often comes off as condescending and demeaning, which can hurt your confidence and cause you to hold back in important meetings and conversations. When someone talks down to you, especially in front of others, it calls your expertise into question and may give others permission to disregard your insights. All of this can affect how you’re treated, not to mention your performance reviews, promotions, and bonuses. It can also hurt team morale by breeding resentment, making it harder to work together.
There are consequences for companies, too. Chamorro-Premuzic told me that “having incompetent people who believe they are better than they actually are puts the companies they lead at a disadvantage. Those organizations don’t have the talent they need to rise to whatever challenge they’re facing.”21
So how can you avoid these costs and make your interactions with your know-it-all coworker not just less annoying but less damaging? Let’s look at the questions to answer before taking action.
Questions to Ask Yourself
There are several questions you should ask yourself before deciding how to deal with your egotistical coworker.
Are they trying to prove something?
Not every know-it-all is out to prove something, of course, but there’s a good chance your colleague’s egotism is compensating for some deficiency or fear. Considering their underlying insecurities may give you some clues about how to deal with them. For example, once the head of HR understood that Boris, my coaching client, was trying to demonstrate his value in a new role, she made a point of validating the contributions he was already making, freeing him from the need to tout his past achievements. Is your coworker similarly trying to confirm their worthiness?
Is their confidence warranted?
On the other hand, your know-it-all colleague might have good reason to be confident in their assertions or claims, even if their demeanor leaves something to be desired. Consider the experience or expertise they bring to the table. What are their greatest skills? Is their level of confidence aligned with their level of talent? Do they actually know the things they claim to know? Could it be that their delivery is abrasive, but their underlying points have merit?
Is bias playing a role in how I’m perceiving them?
We all hold biases about who is cut out to hold positions of power. And when someone doesn’t fit our preconceptions of leadership—an Asian woman, a young upstart, someone with a disability—we tend to question whether their confidence is justified. For example, research has shown that women of color have to prove their expertise over and over. Is the person you’re labeling as a know-it-all from an underestimated group? Do they belong to a culture or demographic that you have unconscious but negative biases about? If you think your coworker is acting “too big for their britches,” consider whether their behavior would be perceived in the same way if they were part of a dominant demographic. This technique, called “flip it to test it,” was introduced to me by Kristen Pressner, a global HR executive, who confessed, in her TEDx talk, to having certain prejudices about women leaders.22 To interrupt her own bias, especially when she finds herself judging a woman in power, she substitutes a man in the situation and sees if she holds the same view. Ask yourself, “If my colleague were a white man, would I still think they were acting like a know-it-all?”
Is their confidence pushing your buttons?
Some of us have an allergy to certainty in others. I admit that the stronger someone feels about something, the more I feel resistant to their argument, especially if their view threatens my values in some way. Consider your own sensitivity to confidence. Perhaps you grew up with an arrogant father from whom you’ve tried to distance yourself. Or you were brought up in a collectivist culture where humility was revered. Ask yourself whether your reaction to your colleague has more to do with you than it does with them. Is it possible that you feel insecure when you compare your accomplishments to theirs? Or maybe you wish that you were as confident or sure-minded as they are?
Is their behavior causing real issues for you or the team? Or is it just annoying?
Distinguish between statements or actions that are irritating and behavior that is preventing you from getting your work done. Not every annoying declaration from a know-it-all needs to be addressed; policing their confidence can be exhausting. Is their manner so disruptive that it needs to be confronted? Is it preventing other people from raising ideas? There are times when it could be best to ignore their arrogance. So consider which battles are worth fighting and which are best let go.
Once you’ve answered these questions, you’re ready to decide which tactics you want to experiment with.
Tactics to Try
The situation with my coaching client Boris was unique in that his colleagues had an impartial third party (me) who was able to call out his perceived pompousness. But you won’t always have a mediator. Here are some approaches you can try in the absence of outside help.
Appreciate what they have to offer
It’s possible that your colleague is a complete blowhard who has little more than hot air and an arrogant attitude to offer. But I doubt that. Most people have good qualities and contribute something to the team or the organization. You may need to dig deep to find it, but there is probably some genuine knowledge or capability behind the know-it-all’s overconfidence. Perhaps they grew revenue by 20 percent in their last role. Maybe they have experience with a particular budgeting model that your company needs. Or their sales prowess or their influence might come in handy the next time you need to close an account or secure leadership’s buy-in for a project. Sure, they may exaggerate their skills and successes but find the kernel of truth. And if the ultimate goal of their pretentiousness is approval or acceptance, your empathy and appreciation may help them let up on the “Look-how-much-I-know!” routine.
Preempt interruptions
One of a know-it-all’s most annoying habits is constantly interrupting people. Earlier in my career, I worked as a management consultant on a project in South Korea. One of our clients was accustomed to holding the floor in meetings, as was culturally expected given his title. During a two-hour meeting, he interrupted me multiple times, often talking over me. At first, I was confused. Didn’t he want my advice? Wasn’t that what he specifically asked for? I was young, early in my career, but offering counsel was my job as a consultant. Then I became extremely frustrated. I looked around the room to see if my colleagues would help, but I mostly got subtle shrugs. They didn’t know what to do either. I finally snapped, standing up and leaving the conference room. As I took the elevator down to the lobby, I started to cry. It took twelve turns around the block before I could regain my composure and return to the office. I wish I’d been able to keep my cool, but looking back, I fully understand my reaction.
A Quick Note about Mansplaining
Mansplaining, even when the intention behind it isn’t malicious, is rooted in sexism, and sometimes racism and classism. I want to make clear that it’s not the responsibility of people who are the targets of such conduct to fix it. Women, people of color, LGBTQ+, people with disabilities, and so on shouldn’t have to carry the burden of addressing larger systemic biases by themselves. This is why it’s critical that allies step in and disrupt discrimination when they see it. And leaders—whether they manage a team of two or are at the helm of a large corporation—must spend time, energy, and resources on creating an equitable culture that allows everyone to thrive.
If you’re a man, it’s especially important that you get involved in these efforts. Research shows that at organizations where men take part in addressing gender parity, 96 percent of those organizations report making progress, compared to only 30 percent when women are tackling the issue without male counterparts.23
At the same time, if you’re a woman who works with a mansplainer, you don’t need to wait for allies and senior leaders to confront sexism in your organization. Relying on others isn’t always tenable, especially when your career is at stake—you need solutions now. So while the larger cultural issue isn’t yours to solve, I hope the advice here will help you address immediate interpersonal challenges. And, of course, much of this advice is applicable to working with a know-it-all, no matter your gender or theirs.
One way to avoid this sort of situation is to preemptively request that people refrain from interjecting. Before you start talking, explain how much time (roughly) you’re going to need and say something like, “Please hold any comments or questions until I’m done.” If you’re not making a formal presentation but are just having a discussion where some back-and-forth is expected, you might say instead, “Interruptions break my concentration, so I’d appreciate it if you’d let me finish my thoughts before jumping in.”
A proactive approach isn’t always possible. It certainly wouldn’t have been culturally appropriate with my Korean client. But in situations with coworkers with whom you have some rapport, it can save you the headache of having to hold your ground against repeated interruptions.
I have two chronic interrupters in my life—my mother and my husband—so I’ve had to use this strategy quite often, and I’ve also had to learn to let interruptions roll off my back. They do it for different reasons—my mother, because she’s worried that she’ll forget what she wants to say, and my husband, because it’s the style of communication he grew up with. I’m not always as patient as I want to be with them, but they’ve helped me understand that cutting in isn’t necessarily malicious and sometimes people just need a reminder to hold their tongue.
Tactfully address interruptions
If your efforts to preempt interruptions fail, address them directly. But don’t just raise your voice. That sets up a power struggle and your colleague is likely to talk louder in an attempt to drown you out. Instead, confidently say, “I’m going to finish my point, and then I’d love to hear what you have to say.” Or you can channel Kamala Harris in her 2020 vice presidential debate with Mike Pence. She seemed to be acting on behalf of all women when she assertively responded to Pence’s interjections with the simple, “I’m speaking.” This takes courage (which Harris clearly has in spades) and can create tension, especially when done in front of other people. But the hope is that a know-it-all gets the hint and refrains from further interruptions.
If you don’t feel comfortable speaking up, enlist allies. It’s often easier for someone else to confront rudeness, saying something like, “I’d love to hear what Keith was saying before we move on” or “I don’t think Madison was finished with her point.” If the know-it-all interrupts multiple people on your team, you could agree to speak up for each other when it happens.
Set norms
It’s also important to set norms at the team and organizational levels for an inclusive culture in which everyone feels empowered to take the floor or to stand up for others when a know-it-all tries to take center stage. Appeal to people’s sense of fairness. You can start a discussion around the question: “How do we create psychologically safe, collaborative, and inclusive workplaces for everyone?” And encourage the group to reflect on how you communicate and how you can get better.
One norm that I’ve been using when I’m teaching a workshop or giving a talk to a group where people will be interacting with one another (especially on Zoom) is to “take space, make space.” The idea is that if you tend to be someone who stays quiet in meetings, you should challenge yourself to voice your opinions. If you’re someone who is prone to holding the floor, try to step back and make room for others to contribute. I’ve found that sharing this idea at the beginning results in a more equitably distributed meeting. This could be one of several norms you and your team agree on. Having established guidelines will discourage interruptions and make it safe for everyone to speak up.
Ask for facts and data
Another irritating habit of the know-it-all is to proclaim: “Our customers expect us to deliver new features every six months.” “Sales are dropping because we aren’t quick enough to respond to complaints.” “In a year, no one will even be talking about this election.” If you’re sitting there thinking, How do they know that? Why are they so sure? it’s OK to ask for sources or data that back up their declarations.
Be respectful, not confrontational, when doing this. You might say something like “I’m not sure we’re working with the same assumptions and facts. Let’s step back and take a look at the data before we proceed.” Of course, you may not interpret the data in the same way or even have data available. If you can suggest gathering some, do so. For instance, if your colleague insists that customers will hate the new feature the R&D team is proposing, is it feasible to run a short customer survey?
Even if your domineering colleague doesn’t respond well to these kinds of inquiries the first few times, they may come to expect your requests for evidence and think twice before blurting out unsubstantiated claims. And asking them to explain how they know something may help them see the limits of their knowledge and encourage some humility in the future.
When you’re meeting with a know-it-all, show up with verified facts in hand. The more prepared you are to defend your perspective and to counter any misleading statements they make, the better. You’ll also be reinforcing the importance of fact-based discussions over posturing.
Model humility and an open mind
Many show-offs act the way they do because it’s worked for them in the past, or because implicitly or explicitly they’ve received messages that projecting confidence is what’s expected on your team, in your organization, or in the culture they’re from. You can provide a different model by displaying humility and open-mindedness. Try saying, “I don’t know” or “I don’t have that information right now; let me get back to you.” If the know-it-all sees that you suffer no consequences for expressing uncertainty, they may be willing to do the same.
You can even prompt them to be humbler by encouraging everyone to come to meetings having thought through the pros and cons of solutions or ideas they want to propose. Or you can ask questions like:
- What’s another viewpoint?
- If we tried to see this from another perspective, what might we think?
- What are the benefits and risks of this approach?
Because some know-it-alls are seeking validation, simply acknowledging their ideas can prevent grandstanding. Thank them for sharing their thoughts or highlight one or two things you appreciate about their perspective before sharing yours or diving in with questions. For instance, you might say, “That’s a useful point. I agree with the first part of what you said, and I see the second part slightly differently. Let’s talk that through.”
This is what Kwame did with his coworker Amara. “During meetings, she’d act like she knew everything and wouldn’t ask any questions, but then she’d come to me afterward for clarification,” he told me. He was pretty sure that she was afraid of looking stupid. “It seemed like she was worried that people would judge her for not knowing the subject inside and out,” he explained. He wanted to tell her outright that asking questions was nothing to be ashamed of, but he suspected she would deny her insecurity, so instead he modeled asking questions in meetings and even occasionally said, “I hope you don’t mind me inquiring about these things. This is how I learn.” It took several months, but over time, Amara started to feel more comfortable saying she wasn’t sure about something or even asking Kwame for an explanation in front of others.
Phrases to Use
It can be hard to choose the right words when talking to someone who thinks they know everything, so here is some sample language to get you started. Adapt it and make it your own.
In direct response to mansplaining
“Thanks, I’ve got this.”
“Your comment makes me wonder if you’re familiar with my background in [topic].”
“I’d appreciate it if you would respect that I know what I’m doing. I value your input and I’ll definitely ask for it when I need it.”
Preempt and address interruptions
“Please hold any comments or questions until I’m done.”
“Interruptions break my concentration, so I’d appreciate it if you’d let me finish my thoughts before jumping in.”
“I’m going to continue, and I’ll address that when I’m done.”
“I’m going to finish my point, and then I’d love to hear what you have to say.”
“I’m speaking …”
Speak up for others
“Before we get there, I’d like to hear the rest of Marcus’s point.”
“Deidre, were you finished? If not, let’s hear you out before we move on.”
“I know Daniel has a lot of experience in this area. I’d like to know what he thinks.”
“This is your project, Gayle. How do you see it?”
Ask for facts and data
“Tell me a little about where your insights are coming from.”
“I’d love to know more about the conclusions you’ve reached.”
Model humility
“Let me tell you what I do know and don’t know.”
“We’re all still learning what we can about this topic.”
“I can’t tell you that with certainty. I do have an informed opinion, which is …”
Ask them to stop
Your coworker may not be aware of what they’re doing and how it’s impacting the people around them. In a private, one-on-one conversation, you might say something along the lines of, “Whenever we discuss decisions, you assert yourself with such force that it’s hard to continue the conversation. It would help me to know that you’re hearing and considering my views, even if you don’t agree with them.” You could even try using humor and say something like, “Thanks for explaining something to me that I already know!”
Bear in mind that when gender plays a role, there may be additional risks to this approach. Women risk being labeled as overly sensitive or accused of “playing the gender card,” and these unfair perceptions could hurt your reputation or career. This isn’t to say you shouldn’t speak up; just keep in mind how things might play out. In cases of biased backlash, consider raising the issue with someone who can (and will) address it—your manager or even HR. Mansplaining has become such a commonly used term that it feels increasingly innocuous, but remember that the condescension and the gender bias behind it can often limit opportunities and corrode team culture. Ideally your organization takes these transgressions seriously. There has been a recent push for companies to formally sanction mansplaining and assess for listening and respect in performance evaluations.24
• • •
Let’s return to Lucia, who dreaded meetings with her colleague Ray, because he would monopolize conversations with his pontificating. Her initial coping mechanism was to tune him out, and she’d take out her phone or laptop if the meeting ran long and answer emails. But she also recognized that his behavior was more than annoying. With him taking up so much airspace, her opinions weren’t getting heard—by him or anyone else. And she saw that others were being similarly silenced.
So instead of ignoring Ray, she engaged with him. At first this meant showing appreciation for what he offered—pointing out moments in his monologues when he made a good point—but these accolades did little to calm his ego. It seemed to spur him to go on longer. So she employed a different tactic: asking clarifying questions about his assumptions. When she did, he soon realized that he didn’t always have the answers and would turn to his teammates to respond. This had two benefits: it gave others a chance to show off their expertise and it humbled him. Lucia says one of the most helpful things for her was knowing she wasn’t alone. When she and her colleagues exchange glances now, it isn’t only to commiserate, but to decide who is going to respectfully cut Ray off, a responsibility they share.
Working with a know-it-all is irritating at best and career-limiting at worst. But you don’t need to sit back and suffer. Like Lucia, you can take steps to curb your colleague’s bluster—or at least lessen its impact.
The Know-It-All
DO:
- Preempt a know-it-all’s interruptions by saying something like, “Please hold any comments or questions until I’m done” or “Interruptions break my concentration, so I’d appreciate it if you’d let me finish before jumping in.”
- Ask for sources or data that back up their statements.
- Model humility and open-mindedness by asking for other viewpoints.
- Enlist the help of colleagues to stop interruptions and set norms on your team that discourage people from hogging the floor.
- Consider whether your own bias is playing a role in labeling your colleague a “know-it-all.”
DON’T:
- Get into a power struggle about who’s right and who’s wrong.
- Assume they know that they’re mansplaining or being condescending.
- Try to address every transgression—it’s OK to let some things go.
- Allow your colleague to make you feel small.