Aya Rahal: Social Legacy
Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.
—Shannon Adler
Aya Rahal kissed her girlfriend Loulia Bahar passionately. She was ecstatic that they were able to spend the night together. Her joy was short-lived. Immediately, it crossed her mind that it could be months before they could spend time like this again.
Aya was a widow, so there were no hitches on her end. Loulia, on the other hand, was engaged. She had to lie to her fiancée about this trip and claimed she had to address a family emergency. Like other Middle Eastern lesbians, they had to keep their affair very secret. Aside from themselves, nobody else knew.
On many occasions, Aya hated herself. Why did she have to turn out this way? She wondered. Why can’t she simply be like other women? The passion she and Loulia felt for each other was insatiable. They longed for each other’s company every day, every hour, and every minute.
What suddenly crossed her mind brought immediate fear. She wondered whether her mobile phone may be traced. If someone traced her calls, they’d be suspicious about the volume of calls she and Loulia made to each other.
The past 6 months completely transformed her life. From being a tech specialist clerk in a Middle Eastern bank, she had evolved into one of the most influential gay activist leaders in the Middle East and Africa. She did it all through social media and a transcripted lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning (or queer) (LGBTQ) matching service through a website and app. She initiated the effort in a desperate move to find a partner in this impossible environment. Little did she know that in just a few months there would be close to a million subscribers worldwide. Had it not been through the assistance of her cousin Ahmed, she could not have managed the overwhelming subscription and community support. The website crashed more than a dozen times in the first month of operation.
She still recalls the conversation she had with Ahmed one night in her home.
It was after a family reunion dinner and when all the guests left, she pulled Ahmed to one corner.
“Ahmed, I need to talk to you. Please come with me.”
They sat in a couch in quiet corner room in her house. It was her home office, library, and sanctuary. This was the place where it all began. The exact spot where she created the website and app that started the gay rights movement in the Middle East and Africa.
Her heart was beating so fast that it made her dizzy. She noticed that her hands were literally shaking. Ahmed was her cousin and one of her closest friends, yet there are many things she couldn’t tell him. But given the technological problems she was experiencing in the website and the app, Ahmed was her best bet. He was a master web designer and entrepreneur. He had studied in Europe and can view the world in many lenses. Yet, from their upbringing, she wasn’t sure how he would react to what he was about to tell him. She had no choice.
Her voice shook when she said, “Ahmed... I... I am a lesbian.”
Tears rolled down her eyes as Ahmed looked at her sadly.
“I’m sorry…” he said in a meek voice, “I mean, I understand…but this must be very difficult.”
“It is...,” Aya said in a trailing voice.
There was complete silence. It was as if the stillness of the night from outside the room crept quietly inside and surrounded them.
Ahmed stammered saying, “Why... I mean… Why are you telling me this? Why now?”
Aya regained her composure. Some people described her as tough. In the heat of adversity, she rises like a wounded warrior battling for life. In this case, she had no choice. She had to be strong. If this technical problem won’t be resolved, people will complain and investigate. She was uncertain about her web security as well. If someone hacks the site, someone would be able to identify her. It would be like coming out to the whole world! And from a Middle Eastern country of all places! Her entire country will crucify her. Ahmed’s expertise in web security is her sole salvation. There was no other option.
“Have you heard about the website and app “Yuzhir” or come out?” she asked tentatively.
“Yes, who hasn’t? The site is growing to be immensely popular. Did you get listed in the site?”
Aya shook her head, “No... not just that. I started it. I built the entire program.”
Ahmed looked at her astoundingly. “You?...”
“Yes” Aya said, “I never expected it to get this crazy.”
Ahmed looked worried, “My cousin, you could be in grave danger. It might be best for you to leave the country right away. If you wish to continue the site, run it from America or in a clandestine location somewhere in Europe.”
“I can. But, I have bigger problems at the moment. The website has crashed several times and I don’t know how to fix it. Moreover, I think the web security has been compromised. I need help fast. Can you please help me?”
Ahmed looked at her intently, “Of course, my dear cousin. Show me the program.”
That conversation took place several months back. A lot has happened since then. Ahmed became more involved in the enterprise. In fact, he agreed to become co-founder. They set up an office in a discreet location in the United States. They upgraded the server capacity in order to handle millions of users and avoid instances of website crashing. In addition, they invested heavily in security and privacy protocols. Ahmed added his entrepreneurial flair by pursuing several revenue streams. They were able to attract several major advertisers. The majority of users opted to pay a fee rather than just use the free service. The enterprise soon started to be very profitable and sustainable. In just a few months, Yuzhir became not only the fastest growing website in the Middle East but also the most influential force in the gay rights movement in the Middle East and Africa. While operating anonymously, it was able to push for policy reform as well as fair treatment for the LGBTQ community in business, academia, and government organizations.
Aya stared at Loulia as they lay together in bed. She gave her a passionate kiss. Perhaps, she thought, they could be together after all. With the world changing in the strange ways it does, maybe there’s hope for them.
Legacy Lesson 2: Use social capital to make a dramatic change.
Art courtesy of Allison Brannon