Chapter Eleven
Creating Cultures of Appreciation: Respect, Pride, and Fiscal Responsibility
Do not wait for leaders; do it alone,
person to person.
person to person.
—Mother Teresa
I was attending my fourth meeting with the executive team at a high-tech company. We were well on our way...addressing the underlying reasons for tension within the group. When I had first arrived at the company three weeks earlier, Hans, the CEO, told me that their executive meetings dragged on, hour after unproductive hour, punctuated by outbursts of hostility and blame.
Hans told me that people left the meeting with migraines and often team members would refuse to talk to each other for days after their gatherings.
We had made progress. This was our fourth meeting and we were proceeding in a civilized tone. However, when we adjourned for lunch I looked around the table and realized the executive team members looked pale and exhausted. I had taken away their source of energy—hostility—and I had not replaced it. The absence of anger and outrage left a vacuum. There was no passion, no connectedness.
When we gathered again in the conference room I changed the afternoon agenda. I shared what I had observed over lunch and explained that we needed to move further down the continuum—away from negative energy to solidly plant the group in positive interactions before we moved on. I leaned on my relationship with Hans, the CEO, and asked him to be the first “receiver.”
I took out a blank piece of paper and said, “I’d like you to go around the table, and tell Hans one thing you respect about him as a person or one skill that he brings to this table that you appreciate.” They stared at me as if I was mad.
I sat expectantly, without apology, as if I made this request every day and, of course, they would comply. “I’ll write down your comments and give them to Hans. Then we’ll move to the next person. If we spend 10 minutes on each person, we should be done in a little over an hour.” They continued to stare at me.
I told the secret only I knew. “I know you respect each other and admire the commitment each of you has made to this company. Every one of you mentioned this to me during your interview. Now you need to tell each other. If we don’t do this, the team won’t have the energy it needs to optimize your work.”
leave their jobs.
—Randy Sigel
“Seven Steps to Keep Top Performers”
Public Relations Journal (February, 1999)
“Seven Steps to Keep Top Performers”
Public Relations Journal (February, 1999)
They realized I was serious. Greg, the VP of engineering, turned to Hans and thanked him for the tenacious dedication Hans had shown in his role as CEO. Greg commented on Hans’s business and engineering savvy, and his ability to build rapport with customers. It was the first unadulterated statement of appreciation that had been made during a team meeting in more than a year.
They continued around the table. Each person made a statement about Hans’s talents, perspectives, and commitment. I documented their remarks, handed them to Hans, and we shifted to the next person. Each team member made a comment. Some said one or two things, and some spoke paragraphs of appreciation about each person. They expanded the assignment more than two hours. My hand cramped. I was delighted.
The energy shifted. Shoulders softened. It was the first time I saw them smile. They began building on each other’s comments, and acknowledging how interdependent their achievements had been.
The tears that formed in the corners of eyes confirmed how much they had ached to hear exactly what they were now receiving. When we finished, everything had changed.
Resentments evaporated and transgressions were forgiven. Generosity and gratitude took center stage. It was as if someone switched stations from one of unrelenting criticism and accusations to a bandwidth of humility and compassion. These simple acts actually took tremendous courage—much more than when they raged.
For the first time I was certain that they would come through to the other side of their struggles. By creating an atmosphere of mutual respect they were being energized at a cellular level.
My job was more than half done. Within the energy of appreciation the systemic and process problems that had been the cause of their earlier hostility and hopelessness would be relatively easy to repair.
When organizations fail to make a commitment to positive energy, the daily grind of frustrations and delays and disappointments pulls teams and groups toward negativity, pettiness, and irritability. Without a conscious commitment to create positive energy, nothing compensates or rewards individuals for unnoticed investments and sacrifices.
Preserving goodwill
I consulted with a creative marketing firm in North Carolina that was struggling with tension. As my involvement with them drew to an end I challenged the group to adopt an appreciation ritual as a means of maintaining the positive energy they had created during our work together.
Since that time they’ve honored one of their team members at each of their weekly staff meetings. Each of the 14 employees name one trait their colleague brings to work that adds to their creativity, productivity, or atmosphere. Because the name of the individual is pulled at random at the meetings, the upcoming assignment shifts their focus during the week to everyone.
Their CEO, Mary Tribble, claims that this brief ritual not only transforms their meetings, it improves the atmosphere throughout the week. Small acts of observation and verbal acknowledgement force the group to focus on their strengths and accomplishments. Without intentional, periodic, scheduled time dedicated to public appreciation, day-to-day irritants drain goodwill and energy.
human being may very well lack one of nature’s most
powerful antidotes to stress.
—James Lynch, M.D., University of Maryland
Connections to others increase the enjoyment of positive moments and help us bear hard times. Researchers who studied the turbulent breakup of AT&T in the 1990s found that employees with supportive bosses experienced significantly better health than those with unsupportive bosses. Employees with aloof or critical supervisors had twice the number of illnesses, obesity, sexual problems, and episodes of depression as their more fortunate peers.
Even under the worst conditions—for example, combat duty in war—relationships make a difference in resiliency. A study of WWII veterans by the United Sates Office of the Surgeon General found that combat soldiers who were members of highly bonded, cohesive groups with strong identification had fewer psychiatric breakdowns in battle. Soldiers who were lonely and isolated suffered the greatest psychological damage.
World-class appreciation
Organizations that are deeply engaged in building and maintaining cultures of appreciation seem to do so effortlessly. When positive energy reaches a critical mass, it becomes infectious and self-replicating. However, I’ve never been in a highly positive culture that didn’t consciously dedicate resources to recognizing and honoring employees, customers, and vendors.
When someone walks into Ryan Companies US, Inc., a national development, design-build construction and property management firm, you sense immediately this is an organization dedicated to its values. Symbols of meaning are everywhere.
Building lasting relationships Ryan Companies US, Inc.
A photograph of the founding grandfather, James Henry Ryan, is displayed prominently on the wall. A full-size replica of the first Ryan service vehicle (a model “T”) sits in the middle of the hallway. Meeting rooms are named for regional offices and are decorated with photos of projects their offices have completed. When staff visit the main office from outside the local area they feel welcome.
Ryan allows 5 percent of work time to be spent volunteering. Employees volunteer at local hospitals, soup kitchens, and social service programs. When a retired developer and customer had a stroke, employees took turns taking him to physical therapy.
they work their hearts out. You can’t fake it. People know.
—Jim Ryan, CEO, Ryan Companies US, Inc.
Ryan employees form a tight-knit group that extends beyond the workday. A former Ryan project manager left the company for another firm and two years later he died suddenly. One of his former colleagues called his widow and asked how they could help. The following weekend a dozen employees went to the former employee’s house and finished home-improvement projects, including pouring new concrete steps and painting the exterior of the house.
Every quarter, the company gathers for an all-employee meeting to discuss market changes, new projects, profit sharing, and stretch goals. The room is dead quiet, every employee from the CFO, to the CEO, mailroom and construction workers crowd into the room.
But the meeting starts with heart, not statistics. The first presenter on the agenda reports on volunteer projects. People who have benefited from Ryan volunteers also speak at these meetings as a way to thank employees and describe the difference they’ve made in the lives of others.
Recognition of employees is ongoing and the centerpiece of their celebrations. Every November, 700 Ryan employees begin peer nominations for the recipient of the James Henry Ryan Award for “Honesty and integrity in dealing with customers...,” “Exceptional dedication and service...,” “Keen loyalty and pride...,” and “A willingness to assist and help others….” The CEO, Jim Ryan, and past recipients of the award review the peer nominations and Jim chooses one recipient.
The Ryan holiday party the following month includes current and retired employees from across the country, flown in at the company’s expense. There’s an undercurrent of suspense as the recipient of the James Henry Ryan Award is announced, and his or her spouse, children, parents, and siblings appear on stage. No one in the company, including the recipient, knows the award-winner except for family members, who are sworn to secrecy by Jim Ryan and his assistants.
The thought and sensitivity that goes into the event is represented by a $5,000 grant awarded to the winner. In keeping with company values, the award goes to the charity of the recipient’s choice. Other employees share the joy of the recipient’s opportunity to benefit others. This company knows how to build positive energy.
Best practices
Much has been written on acknowledging and recognizing employees. Although these books are rich in ideas, you can also learn from your own experiences. When have you felt truly honored and appreciated at work? When did you feel that recognition programs were superficial, or even insulting? What were the ingredients? What made it special and meaningful, or hollow?
Seek input from employees. This can be collected in focus groups, interviews, or surveys. If you create a standing group that is committed to this subject, include upper management and rotate the positions every year. That way you’ll get fresh ideas from a cross section of the organization and more people will take ownership in the process.
Create or open channels of internal and external customer feedback. Encourage employees to interview between three to five key customers a year to learn how their work affects others and what the ingredients of satisfaction are from the customer’s perspective.
Benchmark other companies. I’m always asking my clients to tell me about moments when they’ve felt honored or truly appreciated at work. Following are a collection of recent answers.
1. After attending a seminar on this material a customer service group started an “Anti-flooding” team to identify and eliminate sources of frustration and aggravation.
2. A client in Alaska told me about a memorable time when his management team became targets for a pie-throwing contest to help boost spirits during a period of particularly painful constrictions.
3. Some organizations create monthly newsletters or postings on a central board that celebrate staff accomplishments. Again, this is a constant reminder to be alert to the contributions, competence, and sacrifices of individuals and groups.
4. A social service client hosts an annual reward event that celebrates people in a humorous and eclectic ways, such as “rookie of the year.” They give coupons for coffee, books, or movies that can be awarded on the spot for “going the extra mile.”
5. A client that was under tremendous pressure broke up the monotony of the afternoon production quotas by spinning a huge, wooden, homemade wheel every day at 2 p.m. The prizes, which were imaginative and harebrained, averaged around $10. However, they were awarded on a random basis and everyone on the floor was eligible. It provided a few minutes of cheer, joking, chatter, and stimulation. They took pride in the homemade wheel and the hands-on, amateurish charm of the awards.
6. The CEO of Murphy Warehouse in Minneapolis sends a handwritten birthday card to every employee. While I was working there, I heard about this practice spontaneously from at least 10 different employees. Murphy also has a practice of granting loans to long-term employees. The human resource person told me no on has ever reneged on a loan.
7. Murphy also allows employees to donate vacation or sick time to employees during a crisis. When an employee suffered a stroke a year from retirement, employees voluntarily paid his health and pension contributions for a full year so the employee could retire with a full pension.
8. In one high-appreciation culture in England, the managing director (CEO) excused himself from a conversation with a member of Parliament to open the hallway door for the janitor who was carrying a cumbersome box. The incident had occurred years before I arrived. However, his behavior made a lasting impression. During two days of consulting I heard the story from four employees.
9. A client told me about a practice that meant a lot to employees. They have three call centers and only one of them offers 24-hour service. When the 24-hour location is closed for maintenance, the overnight calls are routed to another site. Folks at the receiving locations aren’t thrilled about having to work overnight, so they make a party out of it. The manager brings in espresso machines and makes lattes and mochas throughout the night, and takes a moment to visit with each of the 200 employees and thank them as he delivers a drink to their desks.
10. One memorable client, Bev, told me defiantly that she not only initialed her shipments, as required by management, she signed her whole name! She created her own unique strategy for finding pride in her daily work. Employees who are able to affiliate with their successes and resolve their own errors quickly develop a heightened sense of ownership and pride. As Bev puts it, “When I screw up, my boss pats me on the back while he pounds me into the pavement. We’re a cool team.”
These practices are fun to read. However, the best rituals of appreciation will be unique to the culture and nature of your organization. Rituals are meaningful when they are consistent with the values and identity of the organization and tap a deep desire for connection and the experience of being human within the privilege of a community.
Staying in touch
At the end of the book you will find information on audio versions of this material, mini-posters, and “train the trainer” opportunities. There is contact information for keynotes, skill-building seminars, and monthly e-mails to reinforce what you have read and strengthen your skill set.
For the sake of your workplace, health, family, and world take these ideas to heart. Feed the right dog—the dog of respect and appreciation—in yourself and others. Remember reciprocity. Be hard on the problem but soft on people. Love is good.
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