accountability, 23
action, clarity created by, 14
activation energy, 24
Adrift (Callahan), 8
The Adversity Advantage (Weihenmayer), 62
advice, 66
AIG, 62
Almost (Klopp), 106
ambition, 4
American Institute of Stress, 82–83
Anatomy of an Illness: As Perceived by the Patient (Cousins), 61
Andrews, Jeff, 151
Angelou, Maya, 3
Arbor Day Foundation, 147
Aristotle, 31
Arizona State University, 32
Asch, Solomon, 93
assertiveness, 5, 67–68, 69–70
assumptions, 26–28, 32, 113–114
Authentic Happiness (Seligman), 116
giving credit/accountability and, 99–101
resisting pressures against, 90–91
BBC News, 142
Beckham, Odell Jr., 25
beginning, 24
behavior
contagiousness of, 57
being true to yourself and, 13–15
thriving vs. panicking and, 6–11
unworthiness feelings and, 4–6
Blake, James, 94
bosses
Brandeis, Louis, 29
from technology, 162, 163, 164–168
Brigham Young University, 31–32, 78
“Buried Treasure” (Henry), 96
Business Buzzword Bingo, 95
Buss, David, 57
calling, embracing your life’s, 116–118
Caltech Counseling Center, 2
Center for Creative Leadership, 162
Centers for Diseease Control and Prevention, 149
The Challenger Launch Decision (Vaughan), 143–144
building resilience through, 45–46
learning from disasters and, 159–161
learning vs. performance goals and, 33, 36–41
quitting due to lack of, 83
Chambers, Richard, 104
Chan, Margaret, 3
Chernobyl, 162
Chesterfield, Lord, 61
choice
in leadership, 23
Christakis, Nicholas, 57
Cirque du Soleil, 14
clarity, 14
clothing, fitting in through, 87
coaching, 19
Cohn, Russ, 163
Columbia Business School, 69–70
communication
empathy and understanding in, 110–112
Community Mercy Health Partners, 24–25
community work, 158
comparisons
impostor syndrome and self-, 3–4
with yourself vs. others, 54
competence, confidence based on, 6, 18
competitive advantage, 20
complacency, 33
coaching and, 19
from competence, 6
competitive advantage and, 20
persistence in building, 30–32
from preparation, 18
self-control and, 21
social support and, 20
defying convention and, 141–154
connectivity, 162
Conquering the North Face: An Adventure in Leadership (Klopp), 106
encouraging in others, 152–154
financial rewards from, 150–152
positive defiance and, 141, 146–150
questioning rules and, 144–146
conversational narcissism, 123–124
Cook, Emily, 19
Corcoran, Barbara, 4
corporate culture, 23
Cousins, Norman, 61
creativity, 53
Cross, Rob, 122
culture. see organizational structure
curiosity
hiring for, 126
illusion of success and, 63–66
inspiration and, 116
decision making
exhaustion and, 163
processes for, 132
Deep Survival: Who Lives, Who Dies, and Why (Gonzales), 7
Deloitte Leadership Center for Inclusion, 86, 88
deviance, positive, 141, 146–154
DiDonato, Tom, 49
Diettert, Eldon, 113
differences, honoring, 28
disagreements, honoring, 28
Discovery space shuttle, 143–144
diversity, 86–89, 118–119. see also authenticity
Dodge, Wag, 113
Drucker, Peter, 96–97, 117–118
Durant, Will, 31
educational differences, 119
The Effective Executive (Drucker), 117–118
Efferson, Charles, 94
egalitarianism, 73
Emmons, Robert, 58
energy accretion, 126
building inclusion and, 99
Ericsson, K. Anders, 76
ESPN, 18
excellence, rehearsing, 25
exercise, 158
Expanding the Science and Practice of Gratitude project, 58
failure
embracing, 34
family meals, 136
Fast Company magazine, 150
fear
of being without phones, 164
humor and, 62
of isolation, 5
questioning rules and, 144–146
fear of missing out (FOMO), 164–165
Feiler, Bruce, 136
Fischer, Lisa, 55
focus
on behaviors vs. people, 27
Fowler, James, 57
Fox Cabane, Olivia, 3
Gates, Bill, 4
Generation Grit action figures, 31
Gilbert, Daniel, 66
goals, learning vs. performance, 33, 36–41
Gonzales, Laurence, 7
engagement increased by, 58–61
for negative experiences, 61–62
growth mindset, 39, 40–41, 44–46
Gruenert, Steve, 142
Gulfport Community and Regional Resilience Institute, 151
Hairston, John, 151
Hall, Mike, 43
happiness, 6, 43–44, 66, 115, 156–159, 169–171
Harvard University, 32
Hattan, Robert, 131
He, Emily, 47
health, 158
effects of stress on, 9, 80, 82–83
social isolation and, 86
Henry, O., 96
hierarchies, 132
Hill, Judith, 55
Hogan, Robert, 28
holacracy, 132
Holocaust, 56
Hootie and the Blowfish, 30–31
identity. see authenticity
incompetence, promotions to the level of, 81
Ingram Micro, 79
questioning rules and, 144–146
“Inside Amazon: Wrestling Big Ideas in a Bruising Workplace,” 10–11
inspiration, creating/sharing, 115–127
energizing others and, 121–124
giving the gift of time and, 118–120
Jackson, Michael, 55
Jagger, Mick, 55
jargon, conformity through, 95–97
Kantor, Jodi, 11
Kickstarter, 31
kindness, small acts of, 55–57
King, Martin Luther Jr., 117
King, Stephen, 32
Klein, Gene, 56
language, conformity through, 95–97
leaders and leadership
believing in yourself and, 1–15
confidence building for, 17–32
defying convention and, 141–154
emotionally intelligent, 41–42
role clarification and, 129–139
unethical behavior and, 142–144
Leading Teams (Guenzi), 136–137
Lear Corporation, 49
empathy and understanding in, 110–112
“Linking Individual Creativity to Organizational Innovation” (Litchfield, Ford, and Gentry), 71–72
listening, mindful, 27, 103–114, 120–121, 124
The Luck Factor: The Four Essential Principles (Wiseman), 12–13
Maestripieri, Dario, 146
Mann Gulch wildfire, 113
Matthews, Dave, 30
McDougall, William, 61
McMath, Arden, 116
meaningful work, 34, 52–54, 152–154
mentoring programs, 119
Merck, 67
Mershey, Milton, 4
methicillin-resistant Staphyloccus aureus (MRSA), 148–150
Miller, Paul, 32
Mindful Relationships: Creating Genuine Connection with Ourselves and Others (Chambers and Ulbrick), 104
mindsets
fixed vs. growth, 39, 40–41, 44–46
identifying a company’s, 39–40
positive, stress and, 11
Misra, Shalini, 166
mistakes, identifying and correcting, 39
Morrow, Dwight, 55
Müller-Lyer, Franz Carl, 64
Mulraven, Mark, 21
multitasking, 108–110, 156, 162
National Transportation Safety Board, 162, 163
Nejdawi, Bashar, 79
New Year’s resolutions, xii
New York Giants, 25
New Zealand All Blacks, 136
nomophobia, 164
normalization of deviance, 142–143
Nothing Is Impossible (Reeve), 110–111
NurtureShock (Bronson and Merrman), 59–60
Olson, Bo, 11
Opening Up: The Healing Power of Expressing Emotions (Pennebaker), 120–121
assuming best intentions of others and, 26–28
hiring for, 126
organizational culture curiosity and, 67, 71–72
unethical behavior and, 142–144
organizational structure, 132
overwhelmed feelings, 41–42, 105
giving the gift of time and, 118–120
Overworked and Overwhelmed: The Mindfulness Alternative (Eblin), 105, 168
Pantry Retail, 163
Parks, Rosa, 94
Pascale, Richard, 147
perspective
loneliness and, 89
stress and, 106
Porath, Christine, 124
positive pessimisms, 62
possessions, letting go of, 112–114
The Power of Positive Deviance (Sternin, Sternin, and Pascale), 147
Powers, William, 167
practice
rehearsing excellence, 25
ten-thousand-hour rule on, 76
preparation, 18
empathy/understanding and, 110–112
energizing others and, 122
giving the gift of time and, 118–120
letting go of procedures and, 112–114
procedures, letting go of, 112–114
professional development, 83
The Progress Principle (Amabile and Kramer), 52–53
pronoia, 6
quality vs. quantity, 6
questions
defying convention with, 144–146
in story telling, 124
radio-frequency identification (RFID) chips, 163
in swift-starting expert teams, 132–135
building through challenges, 45–46
risk and risk taking, 68
Rockoff, Jonah, 120
selecting the right people and, 132–135
Rolling Stones, 55
Rooney, Wayne, 18
Rumsey, Wlater, 113
Saba, 47
Schloegel, George, 152
School Culture Rewired (Gruenert and Whitaker), 142
selected disconnection, 167–168
self-awareness, 20–21, 106–108, 113–114
self-control, 21
self-efficacy, 1
Seligman, Martin, 116
service, offering, 54
Siebert, Al, 8
Skillsoft, 168
Slydial, 121
Smith, James Pat, 151
social support, 20
Society for Human Prformance in Extreme Environments, 6–7
South Canyon fire, Colorado, 112–113
space shuttle program, 143–144
sports teams, 136
Springfield Regional Medical Center, 99–101
Sternin, Monique, 146–147, 150
Sting, 55
“Street Sweeper” speech (King), 117
Streitfeld, David, 11
stress, 9
bosses who create, 28–30, 79–81
health effects of, 80
loneliness/isolation and, 5, 85–86
long work hours and, 48–49, 155, 157–158, 162–163
mindfulness and, 106
technology and, 162, 163, 164–168
Stumbling on Happiness (Gilbert), 66
success
as learning vs. performance, 33
seeing past the illusion of, 63–66
Sullenberger, Chesley B. “Sully,” 112
supportive questions, 89–90, 123–124
survival, resolve vs. panic and, 6–11
The Survivor Personality (Siebert), 8
Sutton, Bob, 70
swift-starting expert teams, 132–135
talent, attracting and keeping, 47–49, 119–120, 125–127, 129–139
teams
role clarification for, 129–139
selecting the right people for, 132–135
swift-starting expert, 133–135
technology, taking breaks from, 162, 163, 164–168
ten-thousand-hour rule, 76
Thinking Fast and Slow (Kahneman), 65–66
Thore, Per, 138
time, giving the gift of, 118–120
time on task, 76
Tomasello, Michael, 56
The Top Five Regrets of the Dying (Ware), 13–14
Touching the Void (Simpson), 10
Toyota Production System, 149
The Toyota Way, 29
transparency paradox of, 29–30
Turicchi, Scott, 77
Ulbrick, Margie, 104
University of Albany, 21
University of Amsterdam, 147–148
University of Virginia, McIntire School of Commerce, 122
USS Sides, 131
validity, illusion of, 66
value, adding, 123
Vandross, Luther, 55
VA Pittsburgh Healthcare System, 149–150
vitality, sharing, 124
Vogel, Meghan, 116
Volkswagen, 142
Weihenmayer, Erik, 62
Whitaker, Todd, 142
Winner, David, 18
Winslet, Kate, 3
work hours, 48–49, 155, 157–158, 162–163
work-life balance, 48–49, 161–163
World Health Organization, 3