There's an exercise you can do (that runs on a similar principle to the goal-setting exercise from Chapter 6) where you talk as though it's a date in the future, and you describe your life in as much detail as possible. It's the year 2040 and I'm sitting in a room filled with luxurious furniture and pieces of art and I have two children blah blah blah.
That can be a great exercise to do. But I think you'd write it differently every 10 years, wouldn't you? God, mine changes every year.
Instead of describing what's around you in that type of long-term exercise, I'd say go inward. Talk about your values and how you're living them out, not about tangibles like what type of room you're sitting in. The year is 2040. I'm blessed to still have my health because I've looked after myself. I'm content and I sleep well at night because I haven't burned any bridges. I failed at a lot of things but I know I always gave 100%. I love being older and I have no wish to be 20 again. That's what mine would sound like right now (but ask me another day and I'd probably say something different).
When I talk about not getting too attached to concrete goals, I'm talking about big-picture life goals—ideas like “I will be worth this many dollars when I'm 40” or “I will retire at this particular age” or “I will be surrounded by my three children who haven't been born yet.” You can't necessarily plan those things or know that they'll still be right for you in the future.
So that's what I think about life goals: Don't go too concrete, live in accordance with your values, and know that the specifics might change.
On the other hand, the place you're allowed to be as concrete as you want is your bucket list.
Your bucket list is just a list of great stuff that you want to do or have in your life. These can definitely be specific things! You know you might not get around to doing all of them, or you might change your list as you think of new things. It's fine. It's meant to be fun!
When you're an entrepreneur, you lose more often than you win. So for me and a lot of entrepreneurs I know, having a bucket list is our way of making it work. While we're chasing achievements or living through down times in our businesses we're having a lot of great experiences along the way. It really makes it about the journey, not the endgame.
There are lots of people out there with websites and resources to help you make your bucket list. Everybody has different takes. I personally love the work of Keith Abraham and I recommend his approach for making a bucket list.1
A lot of people get stuck when they first try to think of things to put on their list. Keith has a great resource that gives you 25 questions to ask to help you brainstorm a list of 100 things you'd like to do in your lifetime.
He also goes deeper and gives you eight categories that cover most of your life. Then he encourages you to think of lifetime dreams you want to achieve in each area. The life categories in my book are slightly different, but we'll do the same thing. As we work through each area of life in the following chapters, there'll be an opportunity for you to add items to your bucket list for the area covered in each chapter.
I'm in a chapter of Entrepreneurs' Organization, and one of our things is that everybody has a bucket list. We share our lists with each other so we can help each other achieve them. One of my bucket list items was to meet Richard Branson, and somebody in EO said they had a ticket to go on his spaceship and they could arrange for me to meet him. Another one of my dreams was to have a business that was valued at more than $10 million in under two years and my EOers said right, let's teach you about sweat equity. (And I got there, but that's a whole other book.)
But then I thought, What a hypocrite. I'm out here having all these experiences and my team is back in the office running my business. They were all working hard so that I could achieve my dreams. What about theirs?
So I entrenched the bucket list into my company culture. Everyone on my team has 100 dreams. They've all written them down. Part of my executive assistant's job is to make sure that every time a new team member starts, they write their list—then I go through and highlight all the ones I can make possible because of my network.
My rule is that everybody has to make four of their dreams happen every year. I get my four, everybody on my team gets their four, and everybody wins.
Here's my current bucket list as inspiration (remember, no judgment):
As we walk through each area of life in this book, I'll encourage you to stop and add some items to your bucket list. Here's the first space to do that.
Remember to base it on your values, dream big, and have fun!