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CRAFTING YOUR CONVERSATIONS: What Needs to Be Said . . . and How!

“I HAVE BEEN WORKING on this thing so long that now I'm lost.”

Scott, a regional sales manager for a manufacturer, was an up-and-comer. He had earned a reputation not only for hitting his sales numbers but also for his innate messaging skills. Scott had a knack for asking good questions and simplifying complex technical details. Recently elevated to a manager role, he was showing promise in the way he worked with reps to help them do the same.

Because of his rising reputation, he had been asked to create two very different types of messages. The first was a capabilities presentation, one that eventually salespeople across the company could use in meetings with prospects' finance leaders. The second was a set of talking points for everyone to reference at a big trade show, one where the company would have a major (and expensive) presence on the show floor. Essentially, the company's leadership saw skills in Scott that they hoped to “clone” for dozens of reps and thousands of conversations. They asked me to check in with Scott. What I found was one frustrated manager.

He had run into a wall. The conversational skills that Scott had been using so well—and even coaching to others—were, for some reason, not kicking in. Scott had spent hours on the project but had little to show for it. He asked, “Am I overthinking this?”

This was a new type of challenge for Scott, one with a lot of opportunity for both him personally and the company as a whole. “I feel like I'm about to blow it,” he said. “The leadership is counting on me, and all of a sudden I'm questioning the things that I thought I already knew how to do.”

Scott had been approaching this project in what seemed a logical way. He would begin by drafting the capabilities presentation in Microsoft PowerPoint, then lift the strongest bullet points and proof statements as the talking points everyone could use at the big trade show. And therein was the source of Scott's frustration. He was thinking of the medium first, rather than envisioning great conversations and building back from there. It is a common, almost expected, approach. You can do better.

I used the phrase “and how!” in this chapter's title with two ideas in mind. First, people have for generations said “and how!” with enthusiasm to express their strong agreement. You have something to say that is worth agreement, right? Second, let's talk about “how” to get there—even in a marketplace full of noise and where most of your audience is predisposed to tune you out.

YOUR CONVERSATION IS NOT A PRESENTATION

Most businesses that I see—especially the larger ones—have The Deck. It is a stock presentation about the organization, carefully prepared and vetted, that everyone is supposed to use. New employees are subjected to this presentation during their onboarding. Sales and account representatives are to use it to educate current and prospective customers. The corporate communications or public relations teams might use it with the media as well as community organizations. It is meant to drive consistency and thus reinforce the corporate brand. It tells the world everything the company presumes the world needs to know.

Most versions of The Deck that I have seen look remarkably similar. The title slide shows a picture of headquarters, an urban skyline, or a stock photo of happy-looking employees. Next there is a vision or mission statement. Perhaps there is a timeline of the company's history. Then there is a description of the company's size, growth, locations, and product lines. Sound familiar?

The other thing that's remarkably similar about these presentations is the reaction to them. Almost no one likes them. The presenters generally like the professional look of The Deck but . . . well, they want to tailor it a bit for their own purposes. They take matters into their own keyboards by rearranging and modifying slides. After a while, there might be several versions of the supposedly unifying message throughout the organization. For their part, audiences know what to expect in these presentations; they tune out until they hear that wonderful line, “. . . and on my last slide.”

If the prototypical PowerPoint presentation isn't meeting anyone's needs very well, then let's consider different ways of sharing your organizational story. How about we tell a story? You likely have plenty of raw material, readily available, to craft the type of story that is fun to tell, interesting to hear, and ultimately persuasive. You might just need to shake up the format.

Many companies rely on published case studies as a primary means to create and share stories. One client has nearly 500 case studies on its website, many of which run well over 2,000 words. That represents a lot of work from the marketing team and a treasure trove for anyone who talks with customers. The problem with those case studies, as is commonly the case, was that the sales teams weren't using them.

Case studies, when used as part of customer conversations, can help prospects understand the value of your offerings and lessen the perceived risk of buying your stuff. Most case studies I've seen are full of information, stay true to brand messaging guidelines, and are professionally produced (they look great!). The bad news is that case studies absorb resources, are typically committee creations, and can read with all the pizzazz of an unflavored rice cake. A more conversational version of that same story should have prospective buyers on the edge of their seats—bringing the audience into the emotions of the situation and leading them to root for the protagonist.

Here's an example. A company in the flash-storage business had developed a set of case studies that illustrated its advantage in speed. One story described a customer in rail-shipping logistics who needed faster batch-order processing in order to optimize shipments. After the customer bought the new solution and began using it, they did indeed process orders much faster. The case study described the what, why, and how of that success with the equivalent of, “We installed the Super Platinum Batchinator 3000X [I made that up] and processing time was decreased, saving money and improving customer service.” Nothing wrong there, except that the story was not translating to customer conversations.

I spoke with the person who actually sold that deal. How did that customer come to believe his problem was lack of speed? In quite vivid language he described the general manager's frustration. “He would arrive at the office early, and then his people would come in but they wouldn't start doing anything. They would be at the coffeemaker or the water-cooler.” The datacenter responsible for overnight processing of the previous day's data was often overwhelmed. Until the system could catch up and produce schedules, no one could begin their day's work. “The GM was thinking his people were lazy or distracted. ‘They're not showing up ready to work!’ he would say, and then stomp around the office.” I could visualize that manager looking around and seeing 100 people wasting time every morning. We can almost feel the churn in his stomach. It probably wasn't much fun for those 100 employees, either.

Now it became much easier to share the underlying emotion in this story. The sales team learned to talk about the true story of a manager starting most workdays with stress and frustration. Then they could show how the problem wasn't the people; the problem was the system. The prospective customers (managers themselves) could easily relate.

To find the conversation starters in your case studies, look for the pulse. Someone is trying to get somewhere, to achieve a goal, in the face of difficult obstacles. What's the gap between the starting point and the landing point? Which emotions (both positive and negative) are involved? What were the surprises along the path?

It is definitely worthwhile to find and hone customer stories this way if you want to differentiate yourself. According to a Forrester survey, only 21 percent of executive-level buyers said that vendor salespeople “have relevant examples or case studies to share with me.” That means about four-fifths of salespeople . . . got nothin'.

The published versions of case studies are still valuable. In my experience, they are best used as preparation for a conversation or as a follow-up (to provide detail) rather than as a substitute for the conversation. Your customer stories won't actually be shared around a campfire . . . but could they be?

YOUR CONVERSATION IS NOT AN INTERROGATION, EITHER

During my time as a corporate chief marketing officer, I had a budget for things such as advertising and public relations services, an annual distributors' conference, and packaging and label production. Potential vendors, sniffing for available budget dollars, would frequently call; they asked that I make time for a meeting to talk over our needs and their capabilities. I would generally try to make the time available. Good vendors are valuable, and you never know where the next useful idea could come from.

The reality was often disappointing. Either I would get talked to (with that company's version of The Deck) or, more commonly, I would be subjected to a barrage of questions. It often felt as though I was being deposed. To complete the picture, there was typically a junior associate present for the meeting—dutifully taking notes as if he or she were the court stenographer.

To a degree I was sympathetic. Ours was a mid-sized private company, so there was not as much information available to the outside world as would be the case for a large public company. Despite the information available on our website, or the content of press releases and interviews we had given about the business, it might be difficult to discern the details of our strategy.

Soon the time came to conduct a formal search process for an advertising agency. I tried to head off any confusion or wasted efforts by preparing a detailed description of our industry niche, business model, and growth strategies. During the search process, we allowed time for interested agencies to meet with our team in person for follow-up questions. Wouldn't you know it . . . several of the agencies that met with us asked questions that were already clearly covered in the description my team had spent hours preparing. And there was always a junior associate present taking more notes.

Today, there is even less excuse for subjecting customers to basic or needless questions. Anyone with a couple of hours and a web connection can do adequate homework on nearly any company or industry. Besides, most executives I know would rather hear your point of view than continue to repeat theirs.

In that same Forrester survey I mentioned earlier, executive-level buyers painted a harsh picture of the salespeople they deal with. They said 62 percent were knowledgeable about the products and services they sell—but 42 percent were knowledgeable about the buyer's industry and only 24 percent knew much about the buyer's specific business. And when the tables get turned during a sales conversation, just 30 percent of buyers said salespeople were “prepared for the questions that I ask.”

You can be the refreshing exception. By recognizing the fundamental tensions and contradictions that your customers must deal with, you can create an environment for working together.

A LITTLE TENSION CAN BE OKAY

There is a lot of talk these days about storytelling. You might legitimately ask whether this is simply the latest business fad (such things do happen) or if something more fundamental is going on. Why not just educate buyers about what is possible if they do business with us? The answer is that recent research shows—at the neurochemical level—how stories affect activity in our brains.

Paul Zak has spent years studying brain activity, marketing, and management. He found, for example, that a neurochemical called oxytocin provides a signal in the brain that means “it's safe to cooperate with others.” Stories can prompt the brain to release oxytocin, which in turn affects the degree to which people will help others or donate money to a charity tied to the narrative.

In his research, Zak proves that stories must develop tension in order to gain attention from the audience and ultimately affect behavior. Attention, he notes, is a scarce resource in our brains. But if a story can create tension, viewers and listeners actually begin to share the emotions of the characters and often mimick those feelings after the show is over.

Marketing might not be brain surgery, but with well-crafted stories it can be mind-altering.

THE BACKSTORY ABOUT STORIES

As long as we have brains on the brain, let's talk about how one of the oldest parts of our brains might play a key role in your messaging success.

The amygdala are a pair of almond-sized lumps near the brain stem that formed much of our earliest thinking as humans. By comparison, our “gray matter” (the cerebral cortex) is much newer.

Seth Godin, the entrepreneur and author, refers to the amygdala as our Lizard Brains. Godin says the functioning of our Lizard Brains is the underlying reason we often manage to sabotage our own progress (especially as we come closer to the end of a project or product launch).

The Lizard Brain is about fear, hunger, anger, desire, and emotional consolidation. Because of it we shy away from the unknown, the threatening, those things that might put us in a compromising position. We learn which people and circumstances put us at risk, then subconsciously steer clear of them in the future. We try too hard to fit in.

If your cerebral cortex—the New Brain—is built for higher-level analysis, verbal fluency, and innovation, then the Lizard Brain is all about avoiding uncomfortable stuff.

Remember this: the Lizard Brain is not equipped to process language. Words and text are only appropriate for the newer parts of our brains. That's why the simple and ancient act of drawing pictures is receiving new attention in our digital age. We are finding that the mere acts of writing things out, and drawing pictures of information you need to remember, will improve your memory. That should help you be more persuasive and effective.

One research group led by Jeffrey Wammes carried out a simple yet illustrative test to determine how people might best learn and recall lists of words. Participants received a list of words that could be drawn easily (such as apple), were told to either draw the word or write it out repeatedly, and were later asked to recall as many words from the list as possible in just one minute.

How did it go? The people who drew pictures typically recalled more than twice as many as those people who wrote words out over and over. In subsequent tests, the team confirmed that drawing a picture to represent a word was more effective than writing the word repeatedly, creating a mental image of the word, or viewing pictures of the object depicted by the word. Don't consider yourself an artist? The quality of the drawings did not matter.

I find that the act of drawing simple pictures is transformative for helping clients remember important facts or concepts. For example, our DSG Consulting clients for messaging projects get a customized whiteboard conversation tool. (I've seen salespeople draw their visuals in settings well beyond whiteboards—including on cocktail napkins, scorecards, and even an airsickness bag.) A client's CEO told me recently, “Even when I don't actually draw out our story on a whiteboard, I have that picture in my mind—and it keeps me on track within that conversation.”

Here is another practical way that writing things out could be valuable to you or someone you know. If your child, grandchild, or friend is heading off to college, then you can help them dramatically improve their note-taking habits. Research by Pam Mueller and Daniel Oppenheimer found that writing—yes, writing—their notes longhand is more effective than tapping out notes into a computer.

In a series of three studies, the researchers found that students who took notes on laptops did worse on conceptual questions than did those who took notes longhand. Sure, the students who tapped out their notes could go faster and record more raw material for the tests, but they often were just transcribing the professor's words verbatim rather than processing the ideas. The students who wrote longhand tended to listen, digest, and summarize. That gave them an advantage in understanding and recall.

For you and your team, it makes sense to prepare (and actually write out) conversation plans in advance of customer meetings. That will help everyone to be more effective in the moment than if they had just read over product information or the PowerPoint deck. Keep some pens and paper around.

WAIT . . . THERE'S MATH? HOW TO USE NUMBERS AND STATISTICS

Which numbers do you believe these days? Are your customers and prospects of a similar mindset?

Marketers, pollsters, meteorologists, economic forecasters, and many other professionals face a rising tide of skepticism when they try to inform and persuade via statistics. Some of the damage has been self-inflicted when people who are in the description business have ventured into the prediction business. That is foolish.

Still, skepticism about statistics and claims has been growing for some time—across industries and national borders. As just one example, a Nielsen Global Survey found that people around the world are skeptical about the health claims found on food packaging (e.g., “low fat” or “all natural”). More than two-thirds of respondents believed nutritional claims are either never trustworthy or only sometimes trustworthy.

Businesspeople need to understand data and use it to communicate effectively with consumers, regulators, and the media. How can you make your case, clearly and honestly, in such a skeptical age? Here are three important considerations when using statistics to educate and persuade:

• Use the right communication tools. Mathematical literacy and attention are typically in short supply, so keep it brief. I have seen people stuff ten statistics into a single PowerPoint slide or a few dozen into an article or whitepaper. The audience is quickly overwhelmed. It's a better idea to focus on one or two statistics at a time.

  Some ideas are easier to convey through statistics than are others. In that Nielsen survey, the most trusted health claims on food packaging were calorie counts, vitamin content, and fat content—things that appear to consumers as scientific, objective, and easily measured. On the other hand, consumers generally don't believe more ambiguous claims such as “freshness” and “heart-healthy” (only 15 percent of respondents thought those types of claims are always accurate).

  Graphs, bar charts, and infographics convey authority and credibility. Consider using them, especially if you have a more complex, ambiguous idea to support.

• Match your data to common understanding and personal experiences. Many organizations try to use statistics to educate some segment of the public. But what if the public doesn't understand? The Nielsen survey found that only 41 percent of consumers around the world even “mostly understand” nutritional labels.

  Part of the solution is to take data from a rather dry context (product labels) and connect it to more everyday experiences. For example, health experts typically recommend that adults drink 64 ounces of water per day. On its own, that number is difficult to remember and apply. But when you instead recommend eight 8-ounce glasses or four half-liter bottles of water per day, the guidelines are easier to visualize.

  Mona Chalabi, a data journalist, gave a TED Talk on statistics that included a great example. She demonstrated the average distribution of flu season by month through a hand-drawn chart. Rather than lines or bars, her chart featured six noses representing the months of October–March. The length of, um, stuff coming out of each nose represented the number of times that month was the peak of flu season in each year since 1982. The visual might be a bit cringe-inducing for some, but it is easily relatable for everyone.

• Be clear about sources and limitations. Many uncertainties are associated with polls and how to interpret them—including sampling (who was selected), response rates (how many participated), and the order and wording of questions. Each can introduce errors and biases. If you are transparent with the audience about the source of your statistics, then that act alone will blunt some skepticism.

HOW ABOUT THAT ELEVATOR PITCH?

I will freely state my bias: I don't like the term elevator pitch. That isn't necessarily because I floundered in an elevator-pitch competition.

The event was titled “Gone in 60 Seconds,” a nice opportunity for entrepreneurs, investors, and otherwise interested parties to gather and network. It was held in an upscale bar; you can imagine that a lot of craft beers were consumed. Toward the end of the evening, a dozen or so startup businesses would give their elevator pitches, to be exactly one minute in length. (Snorkelers and swimmers would appear to have an advantage because they don't need to breathe as often as do the rest of us.) I was an investor in a startup business, and my colleagues thought I should be our representative for the pitch. How hard could this be?

My turn came toward the end of the schedule, as the bar was starting to run short of craft beers. The emcee handed me a microphone, showed me where the timer was located, and then pointed to me to begin. I started speaking. Five seconds later, my microphone began to work. A few people in the crowd (the ones paying attention and not gathered in the back of the room with their craft beers) shouted for me to start over. I did, but the timer did not. Despite my best effort to talkrealfastlikethis, I was Gone in About 46 Seconds.

These types of events have become popular, fueled in part by TV shows such as Shark Tank and the growth of speed-networking events. I appreciate the emphasis this trend puts on businesspeople knowing their value proposition and expressing it succinctly. But I have a caution, one that goes deeper than my own less-than-stellar performance one particular night. This same trend is debasing the more common, everyday, and valuable uses of your short story.

A one-way pitch is appropriate for pitch competitions or for an entrepreneur trying to find funding. But how often does that happen for you? For most professionals, it would be a waste of time to craft some seemingly great monologue that in reality isn't that interesting to others. On the other hand, it is quite valuable to have, at the ready, an interrelated set of short messages that naturally prompts interest and leads to a two-way conversation.

One of the very best at all this is Mark Levy. He helps clients of varying stripes—from executives and thought leaders to top entertainers—come up with positioning statements, stories, and pitches. I once heard Mark recommend a simple, fill-in-the-blank structure that might help you get started: “I help _______ to _______ which benefits them by _______.”

Note how this structure almost forces someone to follow many of the proven guidelines for business messaging. It begins with “I” (it could be “we,” of course) but then very quickly pivots to a focus on the type of customers you serve. There is little mention at the outset of specific products or services, but instead on what your business enables those customers to do and achieve. And, although you aren't going to sketch out a picture, the words you select can help people visualize for themselves what you do and whom you serve.

This structure is simple and valuable. However, it is neither automatic nor easy. As you have already seen, our brains will generally try to coerce our mouths to talk about ourselves. So, let's get a start on how you might fill in those blanks most effectively for your business.

The first blank gets to the specific marketplace need and type of customer you address. That could be defined by organization (such as mid-sized private firms, online retailers, or trade associations in the Midwest) and/or individual (professionals nearing retirement, first-time home buyers with a certain range of credit rating, or single African Americans). Use the “ideal customer” exercise at the end of the previous chapter. Make your description specific enough so that others can readily visualize that organization or individual for themselves.

The second blank addresses your “how.” Do you provide a product that meets a need, offer a service that keeps your customers focused on what they do best, or train others to do something themselves? Is your help specific in time and to a project, or does it tend to be ongoing?

The third blank is about how your customers benefit. This is often stated as objective, prototypical results (e.g., the ROI you provide), the things your customers say, or the way you make your customers feel. If numbers are involved, limit yourself to one or two punchy ones.

A couple of examples I have heard are “Homeowners hire us so that they can have the best front yard in their neighborhood,” and “I help mature companies stop being order takers, and start growing their revenue by 15 percent or more.” You might not need to put all three components into one sentence. If you can state the ideal customer and their benefits in an interesting way, then the other person will very often ask you about the “how.”

I recommend that you have an additional component ready, one that speaks to your customers' emotional benefits. It can help in a similar fashion as those customer stories. Be prepared to share what customers say—in their words. Do you have testimonials with great nuggets worth repeating? Your customers might have said that you “relieved stress” or “were super easy to work with.” It isn't bragging if you say something on the order of “One client summed it up very well—he said we accomplished the things they knew they needed to do, and had even tried to start, but would never have finished on their own.”

It can be difficult to find language that everyone can agree on (while keeping things brief). You will want help, both inside and outside of the organization. You will need to practice saying things out loud, because the interpretation of spoken words can be far different than if the same words were on a page or screen. It's very useful to set up buddy systems and have people role-play different conversational scenarios before they occur. But don't let any of this get you uptight. There is little if any downside. No one will be selling anything during an impromptu pitch or conversation—it's simply an added tool for building more growth opportunities.

That brings us back to Scott, the anxious sales manager who was in charge of putting together two important conversational tools. Scott ditched the PowerPoint for his capabilities presentation. Instead, we got a small team together to create a visual conversation that reps could learn. The audience of finance leaders has its own specific objectives, challenges, and hot buttons—so they would have little patience for waiting until slide 17 to talk about them.

For the trade-show talking points, it was a different matter. In that environment, there would be a much larger and more disparate group of people in attendance. Some might be potential buyers, whereas many others would just be kicking the tires. The corporate team would need something brief and easy to deliver, and that could progress in the moment into a dialogue for those who were interested. They decided on a form of that simple “pitch” structure, rather than the initial idea to copy talking points from a presentation. Both conversations proved very successful.

Now that you have begun to consider your message—including the words, stories, and formats that will work best—we should turn our attention next to your potential messengers. Who are they, where do they exist around your business, what do they need, and as a practical matter, what can we do for them?