9

YOU’RE THE BOSS NOW

At some point in your twenties, you will probably receive a promotion that lands you a position in which people report directly to you. You are now officially someone’s boss, and you have substantial control over his or her destiny. You’ll probably be ecstatic, running around your home singing, “At last! At last! I’m not the peon anymore! And I won’t make the same mistakes my manager made with me. No way. I know better. I’m going to be the best boss in the world!”

There’s only one problem: you don’t know better. How could you? In many companies, new managers are initiated with no training whatsoever. This is why there are so many bad ones. Being an effective boss requires a skill set that few people possess naturally, and mastering it is like learning to drive: watching other people do it isn’t enough. In fact, once the excitement from your promotion dies down, you may panic as you realize you have no idea what to do with your new employee. Suddenly your existence in the professional world has become more complex. Pre-promotion, it was tough enough to successfully steer your own career and keep yourself out of trouble. Now you have to do the same things times two, because you are accountable for what your new employee does—and does not—achieve. It’s a big responsibility, and one that you must assume carefully if you want to sustain your upward mobility.

This chapter will help you navigate those bewildering first months as a new manager. I’ll talk about how to set the stage for a good relationship with your new employee and how you can help her establish goals. I will then go through some of the important aspects of good management—from delegating tasks and communicating effectively to resolving performance issues, motivating a team, and being a great leader. If you have access to a training course to supplement what you read here, I recommend taking advantage of it. Strong leadership skills are not easy to develop or maintain, and you’d be surprised how quickly you can slip back into old habits. When it comes to being the best manager possible, there’s no such thing as too many refreshers.

Starting on the Right Foot

When you are assigned a new employee, you should sit down with him for an informal conversation. Taking the employee to lunch is a nice gesture, and it will give you the chance to get to know him. Establishing rapport is key, but there is a strategic purpose for this gettogether. Remember what I said about first impressions in Chapter 2? Your first meeting with a new employee will demonstrate exactly what kind of boss you will be, and it will influence all interactions from that point on. Use this opportunity to let your employee know right off the bat how you prefer to work and what you expect from him. If the employee is new to the company, you are responsible for ensuring that he understands his role in the context of the larger organization.

Similarly, you should communicate your boundaries for acceptable conduct and performance as soon as possible. For example, clue him in right away if your company is strict about arriving to work on time. The first time he slips, let him know that there will be consequences if the behavior continues. Emphasize the importance of meeting project deadlines and observing the organizational hierarchy at the very beginning of your relationship. I know a lot of managers who desperately want their new employees to like them, so they put up with all kinds of no-no’s—from insubordination to mediocre performance—without saying a word. As you can imagine, these managers are the ones who later complain that their employees don’t respect their authority or aren’t meeting performance expectations.

Human nature dictates that even hardworking employees may test your boundaries to see what they can get away with. You can save yourself future frustration by guiding your new employee gently, but firmly, in the right direction. If you’re worried about being perceived as the bad guy, remember that employees prefer straightforward, timely feedback instead of mixed messages, passive-aggressive slighting, or a bad review that comes out of nowhere. Your employee may not always love what you have to say, but he can’t fault you for delivering constructive messages in the spirit of goodwill. It wasn’t so long ago that you were in his shoes, so remember how you wanted to be treated then and let your instinct be your guide.

A Young Life Is in Your Hands

Good management is challenging because every day you must wear a number of hats. You have to be your employee’s ally, establishing a foundation of trust so that she is motivated to work hard for you. You must be a director, staying focused on your department’s big-picture objectives while taking into account your employee’s unique contributions. You must also be a coach, supporting your employee’s development through mutual problem-solving. Once you are assigned an employee, it’s not enough to be proactive about your own workload and direction. You are now also responsible for mentoring her and helping her forge a rewarding career path.

In Chapter 4, I defined a goal as an expectation of growth and achievement. Remember, meaningful career goals are devised by considering what you want to do, why and when it should be done, and how success will be measured. BlessingWhite, a New Jersey-based consulting firm (BlessingWhite.com), suggests that employee goalsetting is important to effective management because it allows your employee to:

Similar to your own goals, your employee’s goals should be just challenging enough that she will put forth effort continuously. Early in your relationship, meet with your employee and help her draw up a list of goals. If you are a new manager, it’s a good idea to think about this before you sit across the desk from your new employee. Taking into account her skill set and any existing goals from previous performance reviews, jot down what you think your employee’s goals should be. If you’re stuck, ask your boss or a senior manager for help.

Write your employee’s goals in an informal contract and add it to her performance review. Note what actions each of you will take to ensure that these goals are achieved. For example, suppose you and your employee agree that she needs to increase her comfort level when interacting with other departments. Suggest that she arrange and lead next week’s meeting with the IT staff, and help her finalize her agenda ahead of time. Set timelines and follow-up dates for all goals so that the two of you don’t forget about them once you leave the room. In between progress meetings, reinforce your employee’s positive steps by rewarding productive behavior immediately and consistently.

Does your employee have a goal you already achieved? You can help her practice new skills so that she develops the confidence to use them in her work. In his book Emotional Intelligence at Work, psychologist Hendrie Weisinger recommends using modeling (demonstrating effective behaviors) in a particular situation, and role-playing (simulating through live interaction) how a situation might play out. Modeling might sound like a complex psychological term, but it can be as simple as having your employee observe when you call a prospective client. Role-playing in business is less fun than charades, but much more productive. Let’s say your employee is nervous about presenting a new idea to a senior member of the department. Acting out the conversation (you play the role of senior executive and the employee acts as herself) will help her articulate her thoughts ahead of time and anticipate potential questions and issues.

If you’re going to engage in either modeling or role-playing, be sincere and enthusiastic about it. It’s your duty to be sensitive to your employee’s development; don’t ever treat it as a joke. Be cognizant of situations in which your employee may be in over her head, and suggest other alternatives if appropriate. Sometimes you might not have the personal experience needed to assist your employee with her individual goals. If you don’t think you can be an effective role model in a particular situation, direct your employee to the appropriate person. It’s always better to admit you don’t know something than to lead your employee in the wrong direction.

A key part of your job is to make sure your employee meets her goals. You may actually be measured on it. Improve her chances for success by applying all of the people-management tips from Chapter 6. When your employee achieves a goal, don’t let the event slip by unnoticed. Praise her, and then encourage her to reach even higher. Basking in the glow of your appreciation and approval, your employee will be motivated to do her best.

Delegating

You were likely assigned an employee because your workload is too much for one person. Because there are only so many hours in a day, it makes sense to hand off as many assignments as possible. However, many twenty-something managers resist delegating tasks, even if they are in danger of drowning. Some of these reasons include:

Any or all of these factors might play a role in your particular situation. That’s why delegating work is one of the most challenging managerial skills for a perfectionist twenty-something to develop. When I first became a supervisor, I communicated so infrequently that my new employee, Danny, had no idea what was going on. I didn’t trust him enough to share the work, so Danny had no choice but to sit in his cube and stare at the wall. After a few months, I developed the reputation of being a bottleneck—assignments arrived in my queue and never came out. No one in the department was happy with this situation. I was stressed out, my colleagues were annoyed because they had to go around me to get things done, and Danny felt useless and demotivated.

I eventually figured out that properly leveraging Danny’s contribution did not mean wasting his time with “safe” tasks, such as organizing the share drives, or giving him specific instructions on how to do the smallest assignment. Rather, I had to invest time in helping him branch out so that he could become a self-sufficient member of our team. The day Danny was promoted was one of the best moments of my career, because it was proof that I’d finally mastered the art of delegation. Once I offered Danny guidance based on what I knew, and then gave him the freedom to approach tasks in his own way, he actually learned something! Here is an example of the process I used to make it happen.

Step 1: Plan a task to delegate based on your employee’s knowledge, skills, and willingness.

Example: “Danny is really organized and a great multitasker. He did a stellar job helping me with the Widget World booth last month, and I know he’s interested in attending a trade show on the West Coast. I think I’ll put him in charge of managing our booth at the Widget Symposium. I can see Danny moving into a show management role as early as next year, and I feel that this project would be an excellent jumping-off point.”

Step 2: Clearly state the expectations and requirements of the project.

Example (to Danny): “I’d like for you to manage our booth at the Widget Symposium in California in October. As you know from working with me on the Widget World booth last month, we have an approved procedure for coordinating the components and staffing of the booth. However, I would love to see what creative ideas you can come up with for our corporate demo and our visitor giveaways. You’ll need to be on-site October 4–8, and I expect planning for the booth to take approximately half of your time in the month leading up to the show.”

Step 3: Explain why the task is important and what you hope your employee will get out of it.

Example (to Danny): “The VP of Corporate Communications considers the Widget Symposium to be one of the top five annual events for generating company visibility. I hope the project will give you valuable experience working with senior executives and managing vendor relationships. As you move into full-time show management, these skills will be critical.”

Step 4: Empower your employee and ask for his feedback on the best way to accomplish the task.

Example (to Danny): “What do you think about managing this booth by yourself? How do you want to approach reviewing the show’s marketing strategy? Do you want to get everyone together for a preliminary planning meeting?”

Step 5: Suggest a few resources your employee can use to get the job done, but be careful not to micromanage.

Example (to Danny): “Definitely take another look at the booth planning procedure document we followed for Widget World last month. I will also email you a list of all the internal staff and vendors we worked with on last year’s Widget Symposium.”

Step 6: Set target dates for follow-up and completion, and ask your employee to develop an action plan.

Example (to Danny): “I know the details of planning a booth can be overwhelming. To keep the project manageable, why don’t you draft an action plan? We can meet on Monday afternoon to go over it.”

Step 7: Meet with your employee regularly to monitor progress, expressing confidence in his ability.

Example (to Danny): “The action plan looks great, Danny. You’re doing a terrific job so far, and I know the marketing people are impressed with you. Can we meet twice a week until the show so I can answer any questions you have?”

Step 8: Evaluate the results and offer constructive feedback.

Example (to Danny): “The booth’s execution was flawless and the Chapstick giveaways yielded at least 100 more leads than usual. The VP of Corporate Communications thought you’d been doing this for years! I know all of the last-minute changes were challenging, but your organization and flexibility allowed us to pull it off. For next time, I suggest coordinating an on-site booth staff meeting so you can make sure everyone has their schedules in advance.”

If you want your employee to be receptive to future assignments and enjoy working on your team, be appreciative of his efforts and allow him to manage projects independently. Your role is to offer direction and a supportive ear—not to get involved in all of the nitty-gritty aspects of the task. The first few times you try to delegate an important assignment will probably be difficult. Just keep the end goal in mind. The more autonomy and decision-making authority your employee has, the faster he’ll acquire expertise that will make your job easier!

Criticism: It’s a Dirty Job

For me, the most difficult part of being a manager is delivering criticism. Even if it’s given nicely, it’s still criticism, and I know I never liked receiving it from my boss. I’ve realized, though, that if I never suggest how my employee can improve, he won’t. He’ll assume that my constant positive reinforcement means he’s doing everything perfectly, and he won’t bother to learn the new skills required to progress.

Criticism is necessary to any manager/employee relationship, but you should never bang your subordinate over the head with it. You are not a playground bully, so always make sure to phrase your comments constructively. Begin with a positive statement about your employee’s performance, and do not follow it with the word “but.” The “but” erases the good intentions behind your original comment and diminishes the credibility of the criticism to come. “But” may seem harmless, yet it has the power to anger people. Prevent your employee’s negative reaction by changing the word “but” to the word “and.” For instance:

Example #1: “Dave, your site design is very sophisticated, but I’d like to see you replace the pastels with dark colors to enhance the effect.”

Example #2: “Dave, your site design is very sophisticated, and I’d like to see you replace the pastels with dark colors to enhance the effect.”

See how much nicer Example #2 sounds?

Of course, some people are super sensitive and have trouble swallowing direct criticism of any kind. A former colleague shared a wonderful tactic that has worked for me on several occasions. If you want to improve a person in a certain respect, act as though he’s already behaving the way you want him to. He will want to prove that you were right to think so highly of him. For example, suppose you want your employee to take better notes at team meetings. Take him aside and mention that you wish you were as organized as he is. “I don’t know how you keep track of everything that goes on in those meetings. Your notes saved my life last week when the general manager asked for the statistics that the Investor Relations Group presented.” Your employee will think about your compliment every time he goes to a team meeting—and you can bet that the quality of his notes will be better for it. After all, you told him that you love his notes, and he won’t want to disappoint the boss.

Addressing Performance Issues

A performance problem may be defined as a situation in which your employee’s work does not meet your expectations. Maybe she turns in her weekly reports with typos, freezes up when it’s her turn to present in team meetings, or lets important deadlines slide. Addressing performance issues is such a sticky wicket that many managers steer away from it entirely. The reasons vary. Some managers genuinely like the employee with the performance problem and they don’t want to offend her. Others are simply unable to tackle uncomfortable situations head-on.

Whatever the motivation, a huge percentage of managers keep their gripes to themselves. They go about their business, allowing their disapproval to simmer while their employees continue to be ineffective. Remember, people are not mind readers. If you don’t tell your employee what she’s doing wrong, she won’t fix it. And if she doesn’t fix it, either you or your department could suffer a breakdown. Waiting until her review to discuss the performance problem is not a good idea either. You will be forced to deal with the problem for a long period of time until the assessment period rolls around. A review-based conversation also means that your employee won’t have the chance to correct the problem before it is noted in her permanent record.

You should address performance problems in a timely fashion, but you don’t want to jump down your employee’s throat every time she makes a mistake. How can you strike a good balance? The first time your employee commits an infraction (provided it’s not something to fire her over), let it go. Wait and see if the incident was just a fluke or if your employee corrects it on her own. However, if the issue rears becomes a chronic problem, it may be time to sit down with her and address it. The following steps will guide you through the process.

Step 1: Begin with a positive comment—and mean it.

Example: “The General Manager was really impressed with your presentation this morning. He thought you were very articulate and natural in front of the podium.”

Step 2: Explain the performance problem by citing specific instances.

Example: “You’re an excellent impromptu speaker, and I’d like to see you prepare for your presentations in advance so that you can use concrete examples and statistics to back up your arguments. This morning, for example, you needed to back up your claims about growth in manufacturing with market research and third-party support. And a few weeks ago, you briefed our lobbyist partners on our product strategy without citing any specifics about our play in the government space.”

Step 3: Tactfully point out potential consequences if the problem continues.

Example: “I’m concerned that if you continue to do these types of presentations on the fly, a client will call you on it and we could have an embarrassing situation on our hands. As poised as you are, I can’t put you in front of customers if it could compromise the company’s reputation.”

Step 4: Ask for your employee’s feedback in solving the problem.

Example: “What do you think is the best way to plan for your next presentation?”

Step 5: Offer any suggestions you have for solving the problem.

Example: “Can I suggest that you brainstorm an outline for each presentation a week before you’re scheduled to deliver it? I think this approach will help you fill in the holes and anticipate questions ahead of time. You’ll also have time to consult with the Market Research Group so that they can provide you with the supporting data you need.”

Step 6: Work with your employee to develop an action plan.

Example: “If you can complete the outline for the upcoming presentation by next Tuesday, we can meet to go over it. I’ll give you an extension on your other deadlines so that you have time to thoroughly research your main arguments. Once you prepare your slides, we can rehearse the entire presentation in the conference room, and I can help you with any parts that still need some tweaking. Sound like a plan?”

Step 7: Support your employee’s efforts to change.

Example: “Thanks so much for working with me here. Good public speakers are rare, and I know that you’re going to become one of our best.”

Step 8: Follow up and reward improvements.

Example: “We won the new account largely due to your efforts. Your presentation was rock solid, and I know the clients were impressed with your in-depth knowledge of their business. How would you like to work directly with the General Manager on our annual briefing for the CEO?”

When it comes to addressing performance issues, the key word is “performance.” No matter what your employee’s problem is, you must look at it in the context of her overall contribution. For example, suppose she does outstanding work and always hands in her assignments early, but she consistently breezes in at 10:00 a.m. Before you engage in a dialogue about her tardiness, consider if it’s worth it. If her lateness is not affecting the quality of her work and your boss won’t notice because he works out of another office, you might be wise to avoid a confrontation. You know the old saying: if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!

Encouraging Open Communication

In Chapter 5, I talked extensively about good communication techniques. I discussed the importance of assertiveness, or the ability to stand up for your rights, opinions, ideas, and desires while respecting those of others. I also covered specific strategies for leveraging three communication vehicles—writing, speaking, and listening—to sustain positive work relationships. It’s in your best interests to communicate well with everyone you work with, but it’s most critical when you interact with a direct employee. As the manager, the onus is on you to make sure information is shared, and if you fall down on the job, your employee’s performance and morale may suffer.

Earlier in this chapter, I went over how to set a precedent for good communication. Keeping the lines open through time, however, is more challenging than you think. When you’re a busy manager, communication with your employee decreases over time. You’re tied up with your own assignments, and you expect your employee to be off and running with his. After you provide initial direction on a task, you assume that he knows what he’s doing. You don’t check in with him and you don’t ask him to check in with you.

As time goes by and your employee doesn’t see you for a while, he begins to perceive you as unapproachable. He is working in a vacuum, and it’s anyone’s guess whether or not his performance is actually on target. In the absence of feedback from his manager, he might feel confused or demotivated. Pretty soon, he might stop making meaningful contributions to the team, and his career growth will slam to a screeching halt.

Don’t get me wrong: communication breakdowns are not always the manager’s fault. Some employees are notoriously closemouthed and will refrain from volunteering any information about their work. Others will give you data that you don’t need. For the sake of group performance, you must solicit timely and relevant feedback from your employee. Set up weekly or biweekly meetings with him to discuss the status of his projects and to provide guidance on issues he may be facing.

Let your employee know that you are always there for him. Make it clear that you have an open-door policy. If he approaches you but you don’t have time to chat, try to set aside time that day. Remember, the younger your employees are, the more sensitive they tend to be, so be gentle with your criticism. Take advantage of every opportunity to mentor your employee, and allow him to benefit from your experience. Touch base with him often and he will feel comfortable coming to you. When you are proactive about establishing a pattern of open communication, information exchange is easy and your team is happier and more productive.

Finally, you may be responsible for managing a virtual team, or at least one person who works remotely. If this is the case, you must go out of your way to practice strong, frequent communication. Set up regular phone or videoconference check-ins, make an effort to see virtual team members in person occasionally, and use the most current collaboration tools so you stay updated on activities and issues in real time.

You’re the Boss—and the Youngest

In the multigenerational workplace that defines the 21st century, it’s not unusual for you, the twenty-something, to be suddenly managing a team of employees who are older than you. You should be prepared for some inevitable snide comments and perhaps even some longstanding resentment. Here are some strategies for overcoming your reports’ initial skepticism.

Meeting Finesse

Overseeing productive team meetings is another responsibility that separates the strong supervisors from the weak. Two of the biggest gripes I hear about managers are: they refuse to have team meetings, and they run inefficient meetings. Recognize that team meetings serve a variety of purposes, including communicating new goals and information, building teamwork, motivating employees, and providing a forum to resolve issues. If you never call your group together as a team, your employees might feel isolated and uninformed, and problem issues may fester because there is no opportunity to clear the air. However, you don’t want to have meetings just for the sake of having meetings. Here are some do’s and don’ts for managing effective meetings:

Do

Don’t

Be a Leader, Not Just a Manager

In my ten-year career in the leadership development space, I’ve come across the work of Development Dimensions International (DDIWorld.com) numerous times. Robert Rogers at DDI generously provided me with seven traits exhibited by true leaders—not people who are in charge because they happened to get a promotion. If you want to be in a position to shape the destiny of your organization, start honing these qualities in your first managerial position while you’re still young!

1. Great leaders are masters of ambiguity. The modern workplace is fraught with chaos. These leaders possess the ability to stay calm amid turmoil and to be convincingly reassuring. They keep their people focused with clear direction and goals, and view change through the lens of opportunity.
2. Great leaders inspire confidence and believe in the future. Leaders who make it a priority to understand and address employee needs, who can differentiate important items from those that are not, and who can communicate a long-term vision that attains the buy-in of employees and customers alike, are the ones who find their organizations rewarded with long-term customer relationships and loyal, engaged employees.
3. Great leaders have a passion for results. These leaders place emphasis on activities, initiatives, programs, and processes that produce the best return on investment (ROI). They are able to stay the course, overcoming any obstacle thrown in their way, because they believe their focus will truly bring about the outcomes they are seeking.
4. Great leaders express unwavering integrity. Leaders must earn trust every day. Their values must be visible through their actions, and they must be both able and willing to be an example to others. Bad news, such as the need for layoffs or budget cuts, or the failure of the organization to meet financial targets, must not be hidden or sugarcoated.
5. Great leaders set others up for success. Leaders who are true talent advocates understand that feeling successful is a prerequisite for ongoing engagement and that successful people are more likely to stay. But they also understand that success is about more than praise. It’s about developing people, giving them room to grow, and coaching them to be their best.
6. Great leaders have strong, rather than big, egos. Leaders with big egos who feel the need to tear others down are often terribly insecure themselves. They lack the self-confidence that leadership demands. On the other hand, those with strong egos have a positive self-image but at the same time are able to acknowledge and value the thoughts and contributions of others.
7. Great leaders have the courage to make tough decisions. When faced with making difficult choices, the best leaders do not shy away from taking prompt action. They know that indecisiveness can lead to paralysis, and that popular decisions are not always the best decisions. And they understand that too many compromise decisions, although usually less painful to reach, breed mediocrity and lead to results that please nobody.

If you’re in your twenties and are already managing one or more direct reports, chances are you’re on the fast track. You are obviously good at what you do and have earned a pat on the back. But as DDI alludes to, be careful of arrogance. You will be considered difficult to work with if you insist that you’re always right. Your employees can teach you something if you’re willing to pay attention. Remember this saying from Ralph Waldo Emerson, and stay humble: “Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn from him.”

What I Wish I’d Known

Take-Home Points